One act plays - A One Act Play (1 Viewer)

[Alex]

Re: Thumped- A One Act Play

Int. Office. Mid afternoon. Faint moaning, tortured sound in background.

Prick- Prick
Other Prick - Prick

fade out

Brilliant

 

[the_longest_day]

Selling Out? - A One Act Play

Executive - wow, people are really loving your last play, they were HOT for that one

Lonely Playwrite - um.. thanks... I'm not sure they really got it.. but I mean..

Executive - oh no, they got it, they love it! it's about Sex, everyone can get that! ...or not! ha ha hah!

Lonely Playwrite - uh... okay.. well it wasn't really about Sex, y'see I called it that so...

Executive - hey, you can use that if you like

Lonley Playwrite - sorry, what?

Executive - the 'Sex, everyone gets it, or not' gag

Lonely Playwrte - oh... okay... thanks...

Executive - Anyway Jim Carey is very interested in the film rights for "Sexing It Up" so I'm arranging a meeting with his people for the 6th..

Lonely Playwrite - sorry 'Sexing It Up'?

Executive - yeah yeah, new title, it's punchy trust me.. anyhow he's think..

Lonely Playwrite - ...and to be honest I don't really think Jim Carey is the kind of actor who could handle this material, I means its not a comedy... you do know that is not a comedy? right?

Executive - oh sure, sure, look Jims been looking for a return to serious work, like back to his roots, and I said to him I got this writer guy...

Lonley Playwrite - his roots? his first film was Earth Girls Are Easy? what do you mean his roots? I have written a serious play about gender labels and..

Executive - yeah yeah and Jim loves it... LOVES IT! only he wants to change the end, y'know when the father strikes the son, well... how about that the father guy just falls over, y'know... falls over... in a funny way!!

Lonley Playwrite - what?! in a funny what? oh jesus... look I'm not sure about this, to be honest I'm not sure about ANY of this anymore... I mean I keep thinking I should've quite with 'Death - A One Act Play' I'm starting to think that was my best work... it was pure it was youth, it was...

Executive - the play about the dead singer?

Lonley Playwrite - yes... I mean no.. I mean it was a Satire on...

Executive - well we like that one too!!

Lonley Playwrite - really?

Executive - Sure we do! Art Garfunkle is very interested in playing the lead

pause

Lonley Playwrite - thinks for a moment okay... I think we can talk...

 

[Goodbye]

Re: The Internet - A One Act Play

Coffee... out the nose...
thanks snakey

 

[moc]

Re: Family - A One Act Play

i like the way you deal with real issues... thats the problem with theatre these days

 

[snap-apple]

Lunch - a one act play

conor - nyum yum nyum
conor - glug glug glug
conor - belch
conor - ahhh

scratches nads

exeunt

 

[the_longest_day]

Health - A One Act Play

Doctor - ...you have alcholism, it is a disease... but for God's sake you're ruining your life and the life of everyone you love! Get a hold of yourself!

patient exits, next patient enters

Dcotor - Okay, lets see... you have chicken pox... it's a disease. But for God's sake you're ruining your life and the life of everyone you love! Get a hold of yourself!

music rises, fade to black

 

[herv]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

conor - nyum yum nyum
conor - glug glug glug
conor - belch
conor - ahhh

scratches nads

exeunt

porky pork

 

[snap-apple]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

porky pork

yeah - might be time to cut down on the nyum and glugs.

 

[herv]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

yeah - might be time to cut down on the nyum and glugs.

its winter dude, you need the insulation. thing is though, my insulation stays all year round.

 

[snap-apple]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

its winter dude, you need the insulation. thing is though, my insulation stays all year round.

apart from your bonce wha!

 

[herv]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

apart from your bonce wha!

i now have a very full head of hair thank you very much.

its longer than yours i believe. i can spike it in the rain!

 

[snap-apple]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

i now have a very full head of hair thank you very much.
its longer than yours i believe. i can spike it in the rain!

'tis aye - i am scalp-ed and feel the cold.

 

[herv]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

'tis aye - i am scalp-ed and feel the cold.

it truly is a wonder this "hair " stuff... i had completely forgotton what it was like to have the wind make something move on the top of my head.

on a different note, i was on the bus last night in one of the really heavy hail storms and the hail broke one of the windows upstairs.

so now.

 

[snap-apple]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

on a different note, i was on the bus last night in one of the really heavy hail storms and the hail broke one of the windows upstairs.

so now.

jebus. super-hail

i was just on nme.com and an add for some slasher movie came up on the eliott smith page. nice touch.

 

[the_longest_day]

War - A One Act Play

Solider 1 - I know I shouldn't say this, but I'm really enjoying this war!

Solider 2 - I know! me too! I can't believe it, I thought I'd hate killing people, but I actually find it really easy!

Solider 1 - me too!

Solider 3 - Hey! Guys! I just shot another bad guy!

Solider 2 - Well good for you honey!

much laughter


fade

 

[Anne OMalley]

Tempost

Janey Macaroni.

You've got to love this angry weather, though. I work in a massive open plan office which is lit almost exclusively by fluorescent lights. Yesterday the mains power went down and - for about 3 minutes before the back-up generator kicked in - the whole place was lit purely by a tiny amount of emergency lamps. Everything suddenly gained a warm, shadowy ambience. People fell into an ecstatic silence. There was a type of unity, however transient. It was almost romantic.

I mean, is there anything more comforting than the thought of a constant threat by forces majeures upon the crumby world of work?

Or is there a better sound to wake up to than thunder?

on a different note, i was on the bus last night in one of the really heavy hail storms and the hail broke one of the windows upstairs.

so now.

 

[hop]

Re: Tempost

Or is there a better sound to wake up to than thunder?

maybe there is but its definitely not 'wait doctor, his eyes are opening....'

 

[moc]

Re: Lunch - a one act play

it truly is a wonder this "hair " stuff... i had completely forgotton what it was like to have the wind make something move on the top of my head.

on a different note, i was on the bus last night in one of the really heavy hail storms and the hail broke one of the windows upstairs.

so now.

that must've been like the hail that ming sent to earth before flash ("flash i love you but we've only got 15 minutes to save the earth") gordon saved the day... and the planet

 

[Latex lizzie]

Re: Tempost

maybe there is but its definitely not 'wait doctor, his eyes are opening....'

...or "congratulations the operation was a success..you are at last a woman".

 

[roxy]

Re: War - A One Act Play

much laughter

You wish....