Radical legislation you’d love to pass (1 Viewer)

[Denny Oubidoux]

dont fuck with me

 

[flashback]

i hate being in the queue behind people paying for their mars bar with the fucking card. i'd ban lattes, cappachinos, frappachinos and any other ridiculous coffees that students in the queue ahead of me take all day getting served with

But seriously though. Fuck fancy coffees.
Fuck coffee that smells like vanilla or hazelnut or fresh Merchants Quay vomit.

Do you want coffee or espresso?
Select.
Do you want milk in it, or cream in it, or not?
Select.
Sugar is over there. Now fuck off.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

people who put cream and syrup and shit in their coffee or have it made with milk obviously dont even like coffee and have no business buying it

 

[flashback]

you're fairly fundamentalist on the coffee front shaney.
I'd let them put shit in their coffee, so long as it doesn't slow proceedings down, or induce a gag reaction in me if I happen to smell it.


actually... I'd just ban fake vanilla smell/taste. It's wretched stuff. I've smelled better warmed NY subway vomit.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

you're fairly fundamentalist on the coffee front shaney.
I'd let them put shit in their coffee, so long as it doesn't slow proceedings down, or induce a gag reaction in me if I happen to smell it.

actually... I'd just ban fake vanilla smell/taste. It's wretched stuff. I've smelled better warmed NY subway vomit.

i have no interest in what people spend their money on except when it slows me down. i dont think i've ever encountered this fake vanilla smell. must be a USA thing

 

[flashback]

i have no interest in what people spend their money on except when it slows me down. i dont think i've ever encountered this fake vanilla smell. must be a USA thing

how have you not encountered it shaney man.
Its all over the fucking shop. Vanilla candles, car freshners, coffee, there's nothing they wont put that vanilla essence shite into.

Honest to god, I can stand in a hot subway carriage, with a pool of vomit sloshing about over in the corner there, and while its unpleasant, it doesn;t turn my stomach.

The slightest whiff of vanilla essence though... I'm off to the jacks to practice Norwegian.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

oh i thought you were talking specifically about vanilla in coffee. still though, i have yet to be offended by the smell of vanilla anywhere. what about vanilla ice cream?

 

[flashback]

oh i thought you were talking specifically about vanilla in coffee. still though, i have yet to be offended by the smell of vanilla anywhere. what about vanilla ice cream?

nah... that doesn't smell. It might only be bad when its warmed up maybe.
But this being NYC, its warm half the year.
Fake vanilla > instant buttery microwave popcorn > warm puke > smelly feet > Diesel smoke.

That would be my top 5 smelly things rundown.

 

[billygannon]

All financial institutions should use the letter "w" instead of "b".

 

[Jill Hives]

people who put cream and syrup and shit in their coffee or have it made with milk obviously dont even like coffee and have no business buying it

Or the fact that you can't get a decent cup of it here so one needs to add shit to cover up the burnt taste. An "Americano" is watered down espresso not coffee. How are you one the tea front? What about milk and sugar in tea...which I think is vile. Tea should be straight up tea.

 

[Lili Marlene]

Hey Shaney, how are you warming to my 'put a silvermint in your black coffee' idea?

 

[Lolo]

How are you one the tea front? What about milk and sugar in tea...which I think is vile. Tea should be straight up tea.

A wee dribble of milk/ soya milk but absolutely no sugar ever. And no milk in Earl Grey or jasmine tea, there should be a law against that.

Parenting classes should be compulsory.

It should also be compulsory for kids at school to learn to cook, drive, learn a foreign language and the rudiments of one sport and one musical instrument (their choice).

Plainclothes litter police should patrol all major cities, litterbugs should be given community service cleaning up litter/ dog poo/ delete as appropriate.

Intentionally serving somebody food containing a substance they have specifically asked not to be in their food (for moral, religious or health reasons) should result in the establishment temporarily losing their licence.

Playing tinny music on mobile phones on public transport should result in a ban of one month per tinny song (that way the girl beside me on the bus yesterday would have been banned for about 8 months).

Clothes sizes should be standardized.

Idiots, or people who become idiots when the consume alchohol, should not be served alcohol (this will be the hardest one to enforce, suggestions welcome).

 

[coast to coast]

What about milk and sugar in tea...which I think is vile. Tea should be straight up tea.

Now you're speaking my language.

Also I love:

1. the smell of that fake vanilla essence shite,
2. the phrase "practicing norwegian" - thats damn hilarious.

 

[Unicron]

Or the fact that you can't get a decent cup of it here so one needs to add shit to cover up the burnt taste. An "Americano" is watered down espresso not coffee. How are you one the tea front? What about milk and sugar in tea...which I think is vile. Tea should be straight up tea.

Go home yank.

Next you'll be telling us how to cook potatoes.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

Or the fact that you can't get a decent cup of it here so one needs to add shit to cover up the burnt taste. An "Americano" is watered down espresso not coffee. How are you one the tea front? What about milk and sugar in tea...which I think is vile. Tea should be straight up tea.

Go home yank.

Next you'll be telling us how to cook potatoes.

it was her sort that started the americano business anyway. came to europe to fight a war and couldnt handle the coffee. couldnt give a fuck about tea drinkers, i do like it black with no sugar myself though.

Hey Shaney, how are you warming to my 'put a silvermint in your black coffee' idea?

to be honest i'll probably never try that. an after eight with a nice coffee is enjoyable so i guess it could work

 

[Jill Hives]

it was her sort that started the americano business anyway. came to europe to fight a war and couldnt handle the coffee.

There is a difference between coffee and espresso. The grind of the bean and how it's made is completely different. It's a different drink all together. Also depending on what type of filter you use for COFFEE, the grind is different. If you mean espresso, don't say coffee.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

There is a difference between coffee and espresso. The grind of the bean and how it's made is completely different. It's a different drink all together. Also depending on what type of filter you use for COFFEE, the grind is different. If you mean espresso, don't say coffee.

easy... easy...

 

[nlgbbbblth]

Plainclothes litter police should patrol all major cities, litterbugs should be given community service cleaning up litter/ dog poo/ delete as appropriate.

litterbugs should be kneecapped.

Vigilantes / paramilitaries should get their act together on this front and leave the joyriders etc alone.

 

[BonsaiSuperstar]

litterbugs should be kneecapped.

Vigilantes / paramilitaries should get their act together on this front and leave the joyriders etc alone.

i remember my friend having a conversation with this girl about Politics. she wouldnt say boo to a goose usually but once she got started on laws and policies there was no stopping her.
her best one was that because young irish young fellas had no facilities/amenities when grwoing up that they should get given a designated joyriding area to discourage joyriding on the road.....

 

[Lili Marlene]

Make everyone watch The Wire.

you prick, I can't believe they passed that one!

Anyway, 3 day weekends must be passed. or maybe 6 day since we're being radical