People who hate you for no appartent reason (1 Viewer)

[orange pekoe]

I seem to inspire most people to dislike me. I think it's a pheromone thing.

 

[rettucs]

i imagine it's worse if you are still like it in your 30's

I'm shy and in my 30s. Its not that bad, like.

But, it could be better. Still...

 

[therealjohnny]

If she's feeling uncomfortable with it, that's because he seems to be making it that way.

If he's doing this intentionally than yeah, he's a dick

He mightn't be though, maybe Roisin's reading something into it that's not there..

I don't know, we're not always responsible for how people react to our behaviour.

For example, I was attacked by a nice family in a park because they assumed I was some sort of thug that was going to step on their baby as I walked by (!) I wasn't going to..honest

 

[Hector Grey]

Acthually, that wath a pithy two-liner, if you look clothely

you bully prick

 

[cephalopod]

I am the son
and the heir
of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir
of nothing in particular

 

[george mcfly]

being a shy guy under 20 is a fucking nightmare

it's true!
ok, it's like two different arguements..

i know what Scutter means about someone being pushed out of a group. it's a really nasty thing to do. i'm with him on that, 100%

it's not nice..

however, to accuse someone of bullyish behaviour because they're ignoring someone is off the hook. regardless over whether he fancies her or hates her he's not doing anything wrong
Roisin says he's being stand offish or aloof, well like as Bobby Brown would say, that's his prerogative.

Jane, i'm not taking away from how bad any of your own experiences were here.. but this was about Roisin right?

 

[therealjohnny]

I'm shy and in my 30s. Its not that bad, like.

But, it could be better. Still...

Shyness is nice

But shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to

 

[rettucs]

Shyness is nice

But shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to

what I hate most is that....

you go on your own
you stand on your own
you leave on your own
and you go home and you cry
and you want to die

its terrible

 

[therealjohnny]

even worse...


girlfriend in a coma


it's serious

 

[Jerry Twig]

Ended up seeing him out on saturday night and he was grand to me, shook me hand and all.

Are in you in Agricultural College?

 

[george mcfly]

even worse...


girlfriend in a coma


it's serious

do you really think she'll pull through?

 

[therealjohnny]

well she got a transplant...

Irish blood, English heart

we'll see

 

[jane]

If he's doing this intentionally than yeah, he's a dick

He mightn't be though, maybe Roisin's reading something into it that's not there..

I don't know, we're not always responsible for how people react to our behaviour.

For example, I was attacked by a nice family in a park because they assumed I was some sort of thug that was going to step on their baby as I walked by (!) I wasn't going to..honest

True enough. We're responsible to an extent, but obviously not entirely.

Anyway, that family clearly fancied the pants off you.

 

[snakybus]

I just went into a bakery. The woman in there served me, took my money, fair enough....but there was something in the way she handed the money back, it was all passive-aggressive. What's her problem?

Then, on the way home, some stranger I've never met totally blanked me! Clearly, he hates me. But why?

 

[therealjohnny]

True enough. We're responsible to an extent, but obviously not entirely.

Anyway, that family clearly fancied the pants off you.

Aww gee, I like totally blew it!!

we could have done "aristocrats"

 

[Deleted member 3435]

well she got a transplant...

Irish blood, English heart

we'll see

Here lads, don't plagiarise or take on loan.

 

[sarah]

I just went into a bakery. The woman in there served me, took my money, fair enough....but there was something in the way she handed the money back, it was all passive-aggressive. What's her problem?

Then, on the way home, some stranger I've never met totally blanked me! Clearly, he hates me. But why?

i totally know what you mean, I was on the bus the other day and cuddled up to this woman who was dressed in a lovely fluffy coat...mmmmm... and she totally started looking at me funny, scooching further towards the window and stuff.

luckily she couldn't move to far away.

 

[therealjohnny]

Here lads, don't plagiarise or take on loan.

I'm so sorry

 

[Squiggle]

The consensus seems to be that the guy fancies her. I am suggesting that this is entirely possible, but that this kind of hatred is not necessarily fancying, although sometimes it goes along with fancying the pants off someone.

And the problem is not that he fancies her, but that regardless of the explanation, he's behaving like a nasty mean prick to her and she doesn't deserve that.

Roisin, have you thought about confronting him about it? Not the fancying, like, but the meanness? Not saying it would necessarily work, but if he's being a dick, he's being a dick. Might make him be a worse dick, but it might also make him stop. He'd probably laugh in your face at first, by the way.

Someone deliberately humiliating another person, singling them out and being a total prick while being nice to everyone else is not just 'a bit awkward'. It's nasty and it's pretty much the same dynamic as are all the behaviours on the bullying spectrum, from mild public humiliation and insult to outright abuse.

Ok, so these were about your own experiences and NOT about Roisin's guy?

Hi Squiggle, I think we're talking about something different here, and I have to say I'm with jane on this (and also taking mental to new levels).

Like theres not talking to someone when you're going about your business, but theres also not talking to someone but going out of your way to let that person know you're not talking to them but putting yourself in their way as much as you can.

The differences are subtle, but are there. To me the latter case is emotional bullying.

But, whether thats the case in Roisins predicament, thats another story, and to me it isn't obvious.

I didn't say that Jane was insane, or even imply it, I just think that, perhaps, some of her worst experiences are colouring her judgement about a situation that doesn't seem to be anywhere near as extreme.

 

[snakybus]

I'm not feeling the love in your post there, Squiggle.