natural family planning (1 Viewer)

[roxy]

arf arf.

Seriously though, it's also not a topic where people can be made to act a certain way just because of peer pressure.

well when you're 16 there may well be peer pressure to HAVE sex. We're trying to peer pressurise her away from having sex. Is that not better? Fighting fire with fire?

 

[theweeyin]

Sean, I'm sure the outfit you're wearing in the picture is contraception enough. Talk about squashing it in.....

 

[classic seanc]

well when you're 16 there may well be peer pressure to HAVE sex. We're trying to peer pressurise her away from having sex. Is that not better? Fighting fire with fire?

I wouldn't call it peer pressure. I think all the thumpers have exposed themselves for the conservative old fogie's they really are.

Pete, start a Declan Nerney forum.

 

[theweeyin]

well when you're 16 there may well be peer pressure to HAVE sex. We're trying to peer pressurise her away from having sex. Is that not better? Fighting fire with fire?

Difference being, a whole host of pushy 'grown ups' telling her what not to do could well push her to do what she's being told not to do.

The mind of a 16 year old is a fickle thing.

 

[theweeyin]

I wouldn't call it peer pressure. I think all the thumpers have exposed themselves for the conservative old fogie's they really are.

Pete, start a Declan Nerney forum.

*sings* "BBC, radio twoooo...."

 

[classic seanc]

Sean, I'm sure the outfit you're wearing in the picture is contraception enough. Talk about squashing it in.....

the boots

 

[oh shit]

well when you're 16 there may well be peer pressure to HAVE sex. We're trying to peer pressurise her away from having sex. Is that not better? Fighting fire with fire?

are we?
i dont think i was.

 

[broken arm]

fucking 16 year olds

 

[theweeyin]

the boots

Yes, the boots are what do it for everybody, but that outfit looks prettttty tight...

 

[oh shit]

why are you talking about 'her' like michelle can't read?
now who's being patronising?
jesus. people have sex. the question is about contraception.

 

[theweeyin]

why are you talking about 'her' like michelle can't read?
now who's being patronising?
jesus. people have sex. the question is about contraception.

Well in my earlier quote I was clearing up a point about the situation, not talking DIRECTLY to Michelle. If I was talking TO Michelle then I wouldnt be using the 2nd person.

 

[pete]

Pete, a fella would take the pill for his own peace of mind. I would reckon if you're in a relationship the couple should take an interest in each others birth control methods, its in both their best interests isn't it?

True, but a woman has a lot more to lose - that is, a man is more likely to have faith in a woman's fear of getting knocked up than the other way round. In a long term relationship it might be different, but I still think it'd be ropey...

In any case, this is all academic when you're talking about what goes on between teenagers up the front of a Green Day concert.

 

[pete]

Difference being, a whole host of pushy 'grown ups' telling her what not to do could well push her to do what she's being told not to do.

The mind of a 16 year old is a fickle thing.

Hey I'm just advising her not to do anything stupid. If that makes me a pushy grown up then so be it.

 

[theweeyin]

Hey I'm just advising her not to do anything stupid. If that makes me a pushy grown up then so be it.

Pete I'm only doing the same. I was just arguing a point.

 

[classic seanc]

group hug?

 

[theweeyin]

group hug?

bite me !ninjaaaa

 

[roxy]

why are you talking about 'her' like michelle can't read?
now who's being patronising?
jesus. people have sex. the question is about contraception.

I was just defending the accusation of being a "pushy 'grown up' telling her what not to do".

I think, collectively, it is peer pressure, but I'm saying that it's positive peer pressure, that's all, borne out of good intentions. She's asking what we thought about her using natural planning, and a lot of us are saying, thanks to experience and having been around the block, that we don't think it's a good idea.

Big deal, she can take it or leave it. It's her choice, and I dont' think anyone thinks she's thick.

And why is using "her" patronising? I was addressing someone else's post, not hers, so uh...what's the problem?

 

[jane]

Michelle, ditto what minka said. NFP can work for some people, but it really is better for women who are both older and have extremely reliable cycles. I'm not trying to be patronising, it's just a reality. I couldn't use it because, while I'm ancient, my cycle is all over the damn place, and even though it's frustrating (I also can't use any hormone-based ones), it's a lot less frustrating than 4am feedings and colic and constant babypukeandpoop.

And it's a lot less horrible than having to spend up to 2 grand to take a little trip to England. Just think! 5.99 for 12 condoms, 2 grand! That's 4000 Lidl condoms! Or 2000+ Durex ones! (Don't skimp when it comes to birth control...). Or, alternatively, 200,000 euro to raise a kid to the age of 18, or whatever the hell it costs these days.

Even if your relationship is mature, healthy, and communicative (because NFP is really best used in relationships where both partners see birth control as their responsibility), your body is not.

I know you're mature and you're sensible, but even those of us who are sensible and mature have to be realistic. Some of my friends can use NFP, but I know that I can't. Also, I'm too lazy to take my temperature every single day, and to do all of the things you need to do to make sure it is as effective as possible. The bottom line is, some women are less fertile than others, and it may be for this reason that NFP works for them better than for those who are so fertile they can get pregnant just thinking about sex. Thing is, you don't want to find out if you're in the latter category before you're really ready to deal with it, whatever decision you would make. Do check it out, and learn about it for future reference -- the more you know about how your body works, and the more you take control of your sexual and reproductive health, the better off you will be -- but I'd really be as safe as you can be.

You're right that there should be better sex education, but part of that sex ed would caution you against using NFP until you were older. And responsible sex ed also does not encourage young people to have sex, it just acknowledges the reality that many are, and it's best to give them as much information as possible so that safe sex -- whenever they decide they're ready -- will be second nature to them. Very few people in my teen-day (in Amerikay in the 1980s/early 90s) would have even thought about having unprotected sex. I think there were only 1 or 2 pregnancies (or pregnancies-carried-to-term) in my high school of 2000 people, and they all seemed to be ridin' each other.

 

[classic seanc]

bite me !ninjaaaa

oh, right, I thought we'd all sorted out our little tiffs, and that a group hug would be nice. For "closure", as they say.

 

[theweeyin]

Aww sean, you know we're cool, man :heart: