Jokes Thread (1 Viewer)

[Corey]

What worse than finding a worm in your apple?



-The holocaust.

 

[Buzzo]

My friend Niamh hates jokes. They really bug her. She's fuckin hilarious though.

 

[Corey]

My friend Niamh hates jokes. They really bug her. She's fuckin hilarious though.

Good one.

 

[broken arm]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

[c0De_n1NjA]

Did you hear about the guy who drowned in his muesli? He was pulled in by a strong currant.

 

[SONYMEGADRIVE]

have you seen this website yet?
http://www.realfunnyjokes.com/

don't be discouraged by the popups - there's some good stuff there

well over 100 jokes

 

[broken arm]

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

 

[Corey]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

wow.

 

[c0De_n1NjA]

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Whos there?

 

[Buzzo]

blah blah blah it's a knick knack paddy mack give a frog a....zzzzzzzzzz racial stereotype .... glug glug .... what? Then something hilarious happened. And we all laughed. Jokes. Gimme one that makes me laugh and I'll rep ya.

 

[Corey]

Why did Leixlip?
Cos she was'nt Lucan.

 

[broken arm]

blah blah blah it's a knick knack paddy mack give a frog a....zzzzzzzzzz racial stereotype .... glug glug .... what? Then something hilarious happened. And we all laughed. Jokes. Gimme one that makes me laugh and I'll rep ya.

while($lifes_a_bitch = true) {
live();
}
die;


edit: i thought i was responding to code-face

p.s. that wasn't a racial stereotype.

 

[c0De_n1NjA]

not really a joke, but a funny photo of Brianoak i got over the weekend! Hes a funny fucker!!!

http://www.ichorradas.com/details.php?image_id=151

 

[nofriendo]

I still love this one

Why did malahide?
Because Harolds Cross!

Although my favourite joke of all time is...
Two fish in a tank, one turns to the other and say "how do you drive this thing?"

 

[SONYMEGADRIVE]

how do you get to ballsbridge...follow your chest!

 

[broken arm]

how do you get to ballsbridge...follow your chest!

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

 

[c0De_n1NjA]

Why did malahide?
Because Harolds Cross!

thats my joke, i invented it. its mine.

 

[nofriendo]

thats my joke, i invented it. its mine.

I didnt take credit for the fucking thing! sure i invented the first knock knock joke therefore all jokes since are mine!

 

[broken arm]

 

[c0De_n1NjA]

[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Dear No Friendo[/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]It has come to my attention that you have made an unauthorized use of my copyrighted work entitled "Harlods cross joke" (the "Work") in the preparation of a work derived therefrom. I have reserved all rights in the Work, first published in [date], [and have registered copyright therein]. Your work entitled "why did malahide" is essentially identical to the Work and clearly used the Work as its basis. [/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]As you neither asked for nor received permission to use the Work as the basis for your joke nor to make or distribute copies, including electronic copies, of same, I believe you have willfully infringed my rights under 17 U.S.C. Section 101 et seq. and could be liable for statutory damages as high as €150,000 and a pound of flesh nearest the heart as set forth in Section 504(c)(2) therein.[/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]I demand that you immediately cease the use and distribution of all infringing works derived from the Work, and all copies, including electronic copies, of same, that you deliver to me, if applicable, all unused, undistributed copies of same, or destroy such copies immediately and that you desist from this or any other infringement of my rights in the future. If I have not received an affirmative response from you by lunchtime indicating that you have fully complied with these requirements, I shall take further action against you.[/font]

[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Very truly yours,[/font]

c0de_n1nja