Best Bus Story Ever (6 Viewers)

[LMD64]

that's a really gay thing to say.

I'll scratch your eyes out, bitch.

 

[Ex-User (250)]

I'll scratch your eyes out, bitch.

why can't you be more like rufus? *sigh*

 

[therealjohnny]

I propose that a blanket ban on all skangers would alleviate most problems on buses-the ban will include drivers

that and giving the offenders a "Matt Talbot" , norn irn style

 

[chutneyfarmer]

people smoking on the bus is my personal worst gripe, fucking hate it.


had an idea a while ago about a text service a while ago. if someone is smoking on yer bus you text a certain number with the route you are on. dublin bus notify the guards and nab and prosecute the fuckers at the next stop.
i'm sure the resulting fines would make it more than economically viable.

Dudley, you are a genius!!!! If you don't win a Nobel Peace Prize for that, i'll eat my hat!

 

[Napalm]

The driver of the 38 was one of the nicest people in the world!
She used to always have a friendly good morning and a bit of a chat as you got off the bus.
She would see me coming and wait at the stop as I negotiated crossing 4 lanes of traffic. One morning I was running late and waved to her as the bus was passing. I went into a shop, took my time, flicked through the newspapers. When I came out I saw she'd pulled the bus over to wait for me!This is in traffic in the city centre now!

Not sure how everyone else on the bus felt, but that morning I thought she was the nicest person I've ever met!

Here's to you nice bus driver woman, wherever you are

T'is the lilt in your accent she was liking.

 

[stephenoblunt]

On Gerry Ryan they gave a bus driver from the 90 (Heuston to Connolly I think) a free holiday for being so nice and singing to passengers etc. Apparently he's foreign which probably explains it, although on the 84; The baldy headed lad, The Cobra, Dessie (sometimes) and The peanut are fucking cool! But The Badger, The Gorilla and Gerry Ryan (lookalike) are fucking pricks.

 

[therealjohnny]

T'is the lilt in your accent she was liking.

Of course it was!

Did I mention she used to give me free rides( bus rides) sometimes too- seemed she'd know if there was going to be an inspector or not so she'd just wave me on when I tried to pay

what a gal!

 

[Buckrake]

Only losers take the bus.

Excuse my igorince but, Johnny, what's a northern ireland 'matt talbot'?

 

[therealjohnny]

Only losers take the bus.

Excuse my igorince but, Johnny, what's a northern ireland 'matt talbot'?

It's the equivalant of a "Padre Pio", where the non-active provisionals, unbeknownst to their Political wing take it upon themselves to tie a "wrong-doers" hands together in a praying position, then shoot a round through both hands leaving said wrong-doer with wounds similar to stigmata.

t'was on the indo this morning

 

[Buckrake]

...tie a "wrong-doers" hands together in a praying position, then shoot a round through both hands leaving said wrong-doer with wounds similar to stigmata.

...leaving them needing to wear gloves every time they want to eat a packet of malteasers. fiendish!

 

[therealjohnny]

hmm its the other way around i think
Padre Pio= N .Ireland
Matt Talbot= Republic

Its the provo plan to wipe out all opposition through deprivation of small round items of confectionary- that and socialism

 

[veryslowey]

had an idea a while ago about a text service a while ago. if someone is swearing on yer bus you text a certain number with the route you are on. dublin bus notify their parents and nab and prosecute the fuckers at the next stop. i'm sure the resulting fines would make it more than economically viable. Do you think I'll get a reward or a secret police promotion for this idea?

 

[SONYMEGADRIVE]

 

[SadieOutlaw]

jesus, that film 'mac and me' used to freak me out. look at his mouth, it stays like that through the whole movie.

spooky.

 

[Wavioli]

jesus, that film 'mac and me' used to freak me out. look at his mouth, it stays like that through the whole movie.

spooky.

There was a guy in my school that looked EXACTLY like mac. His mouth moved but. Strange how we used to call him Mac and me, and not just mac. hmmm

 

[Cormcolash]

I like the way it was an advert for Coke.

 

[Denver Max]

On Gerry Ryan they gave a bus driver from the 90 (Heuston to Connolly I think) a free holiday for being so nice and singing to passengers etc. Apparently he's foreign which probably explains it, although on the 84; The baldy headed lad, The Cobra, Dessie (sometimes) and The peanut are fucking cool! But The Badger, The Gorilla and Gerry Ryan (lookalike) are fucking pricks.
__________________

i got that driver on the 90 before...stephen's day and i was going to heuston station.....he asked me why i was going and i told him i was going to meet my girlfriend who was on a train from galway..he smiled and told me i didnt have to pay and i told him he was a legend!!

has anyone ever had a driver on tallaght buses who looks like an old version of michael landon from i was a teenage werewolf?? hes a dickhead

 

[Bill Shatner]

I like the way it was an advert for Coke.

i think you'll find it was burger king

 

[Arthur Peanut]

There's a driver on the 77 that looks the spit of Tom Hanks.

Where do I start with buses, provincial or dublin buses?

The funniest thing I heard was from a guy in Drogheda who was getting a bus to dublin. The bus was full and it wouldnt pick up passengers at stops so an old lady up the front gave out saying that they could stand. The bus driver pointed to a notic that said 'SEATED 52 STANDING 0' And told her that if the bus fell into a river the gaurds would only look for 52 people!!! What the fuck? Poor old lady probably has nighmares.

I once got a CIE bus to school from Kells to Navan and the schoolis on the Kells Rd in Navan if you know your geography. There's no stop there so if I didn't get off I'd have to walk from the town centre, be late and get a bollicking from the vice principal (can't remember his name but he looks like a baked spud)...So I asked the driver to let me off cos I was late and would get a bollicking and he said he wasn't allowed to stop but would slow down and let me hop out. He opened the door and slowed down, it looked pretty easy, and I jumped but when my feet hit the ground the bag on my back kept moving and I involuntarily ran across a grass verge and got a white fence across my weedy schoolboy chest. Did he stop? Did he fuck. Did I go to school that day? Did I fuck.

Another time on a bus to kells the driver overtook a car as a car came the other way he swerved and the bus rattled so much he had to pull over and turn the engine off. A woman complained and he laughed saying 'It was either him or us'

If you want to see monkeys running the zoo just visit the bus aras. Here they employ a guy to stand at gates and point at buses. he also holds up paper saying 'Newbridge' or 'Galway' at gates which unbeknownst to him have airport style neon signs doing what he does just better.

Although they couldn't organise a donkey ride on bettystown beach their failures can be used to your advantage. They can't manage the lost property room. A friend of mine left his discman on a bus and asked if one was handed in. He was brought down to a room beside the jacks full of everything left on a bus since public transport was introduced to Ireland. The guy told him to take a look and 'root' through a box. He picked up a sony minidisc!!. I've heard a few people have done the same with their phones.

i think you'll find it was burger king

 

[Cormcolash]

i think you'll find it was burger king

I think you'll find it was