Springsteen v Kathy French Hot Press (1 Viewer)

[Primitive]

Emmm, on reflection maybe it was a good call by Hot Press to donate a 7 page article to Kathy French & not to the Boss! My apologies to Hot Press.

 

[CitySickness]

Everyone who has died in Ireland over the past 20 years has died of cocaine abuse.

The spire is actually a hollow tube, and leads to a vast reservoir of powdered death, a powdered death that gets snorted in the early hours every Saturday night by an actual giant celtic tiger. This tiger has long flowing blonde locks of desire, and a tail made out of FIFTY PUNT MONEYNOTES.

Bertie Ahern is 92% cocaine.

 

[Moods For Mallards]

It's right to say that everyone who buys cocaine is willfully contributing to a murderous worldwide industry that is directly responsible for many deaths by all sorts of means all the time.
But I don't think Lise Hand was quite saying that.

 

[CitySickness]

I'm really shocked at how retarded these articles are. A bored transition year student could do better.

I did my transition year work experience in Independent Newspapers. They wouldn't let me up to the newsroom, and instead put me in the accounts department to cold-call people... well, the sort of people that would advertise with the Independent in the first place.

So those journo fellas need to hop down to accounts and get 16-year-old me on the job. I'll write the fuck out of them dead birds.

 

[avernus]

It's right to say that everyone who buys cocaine is willfully contributing to a murderous worldwide industry that is directly responsible for many deaths by all sorts of means all the time.
But I don't think Lise Hand was quite saying that.

It is. In the same way if you bought animal or paedo porn, you're contributing to the animal paedo porn industry. I wish these sick pervert coke heads would just all fuck off and die.

 

[Mitchum]

It is. In the same way if you bought animal or paedo porn, you're contributing to the animal paedo porn industry. I wish these sick pervert coke heads would just all fuck off and die.

Good Lord.

 

[avernus]

Good Lord.

Glad to see you're finally on board. You've been a dead weight in the background for far too long. It's time you took the reigns of this anti-coke-porn-pervert campaign. I believe in you, wholeheartedly. You can do it.

 

[Mitchum]

Glad to see you're finally on board. You've been a dead weight in the background for far too long. It's time you took the reigns of this anti-coke-porn-pervert campaign. I believe in you, wholeheartedly. You can do it.

I think you should listen to Smashing Pumpkins less.

 

[avernus]

I think you should listen to Smashing Pumpkins less.

That's what I like about you, Mitchum. You're a Thinker.

 

[classic seanc]

200ml of coke in a pub €2.80
2L of coke in Tesco: €1.81

It's ridiculous.

 

[Corey]

I picture the Sindo staff as a very angry octopus who hates everything except mute pretty girls and mickeyless lads. It has the bottom of Cilla Black's face, a Farmer's Journal for a forehead, a big gnarly nose like an old spud in the back of the press, and there's always steam coming out its ears, which are pointy and also gnarly and have pincers on the tips. It has a short-and-sensible haircut and sits on top of a big pile of wellies, tricolours and catechisms. And when it breathes, it wheezes a little and it sounds like praying. Also, it has shifty eyes and really unruly eyebrows that go crazy when it's angry about the blacks or the wimmins or the DRUGS DISGRACE or the silly people who want dumb things like 'truth' and things that are 'fit for print' and it goes ABSOLUTELY FUCKING BANANAS when it sees a celebrity and it smells like TV3 on the top and onions underneath.

Inside in its brain, there is a tiny robot who sits at a desk, pulling levers and operating the arms, and there are eight of those (octopus, duh), which write each section of the newspaper, and then there is a tiny rat with really pointy yellow teeth, and a tiny mouse that Kevin Myers really wants to fuck inside a dirty teapot.

That's MY SINDO. What's yours?

Holy shit.

Detox. Now.

 

[Unicron]

EVERYONE remembers where they were the moment they heard Katy French passed away.

I'd worry for someone if they couldn't remember where they were last Thursday evening.

 

[Pantone247]

I'd worry for someone if they couldn't remember where they were last Thursday evening.

do you think the police will want to know where you were thursday evening?

"no where near Navan hospital officer, that's for sure..."

 

[Unicron]

That's what I like about you, Mitchum. You're a Thinker.

You're spouting a load of rapid fire nonsense. Are you on coke?

 

[cephalopod]

Cant wait to see Prime Time tonight. Will be left scared to put sugar in me tae afterwards...

 

[Corey]

Who said what about the indo being featured on somthing?

I smell blood.

 

[cephalopod]

Basically Prime Time have swabbed the country's arse (including RTEs), and it's all positive for coke. Which is to be expected, but I think there will be more to the show than that.

 

[east hastings]

i was in navan hospital this time last year with you, good times

 

[avernus]

You're spouting a load of rapid fire nonsense. Are you on coke?

If I were on coke I'd have killed you for that remark.

But since I'm only on a cocktail of rum, cough syrup and lemsip, I find you vaguely attractive and am giving serious thought to locating your position on thumped's map, standing outside your bedroom window and blaring My Funny Valentine with a GhettoBlaster.

 

[ITalkShite]

Basically Prime Time have swabbed the country's arse (including RTEs), and it's all positive for coke. Which is to be expected, but I think there will be more to the show than that.

The saddest day of my life was the day I heard about the IRA assassinating Madeleine McCann with a cocaine bomb