Overheard on the bus (3 Viewers)

[Ex-User (250)]

yeah, it's funny how all the ladies who work for ryanair are knackbags. and the way they talk to you in a posh accent and as soon as you leave the desk, it's right back to their natural one. WHY???

This beats out all -

I know a girl who works for Ryanair in Dublin Airport.
She was talking one day to one of her colleagues, who is a bit dim, as the story reveals, and also has a fair whack of skanger in her.
The colleague was telling the girl I know about her new niece, and the conversation led to

: "ahh cool what are they calling her?"
Skanger says: "well she's named after me aunty and me granny - 'Wiviny'"
: "Wiviny? - that's a strange name. How do you spell it?"

...........the reply came..

:Y-V-O-N-N-E

: "Oh. Right."

 

[Phil]

"is...eh...you know like...when ye cum and all?"

"yeh.."

"if there's like...red in it...is that bad?"

 

[Cormcolash]

Ha, the place I worked did a contract for Tourism Ireland and I knew the guys working on it. They actually get Americans asking stuff like are their Leprechauns in Ireland. Fuckin morons.

 

[cyclotron]

I *did* hear someone on the bus telling his mate to 'stick it up yer ma' recently.

Classic !!!!

 

[guy of the tiger]

i was on the 39 about 2 years ago upstairs. it was pretty quiet until a scumnack at the back of the bus answered his phone

"ahhh jaysis! howerya!? haven't spoken to ya in fukin ages man!"
.
<about 30 seconds of conversation>
.
"Listen man, can I ring yeh back? im waitin for a call off Deh Elephant.......right...yeah....right talk to ya then"
.
<a few minutes passes, phone rings again>

"honey? .....allrih'!.....c'mere, you'll never guess who I was just talkin to......."




I don't think he was making an analogy to an elephants talent for memory either

 

[Wavioli]

Ha, the place I worked did a contract for Tourism Ireland and I knew the guys working on it. They actually get Americans asking stuff like are their Leprechauns in Ireland. Fuckin morons.

I used to work in Dvblinia (lame tourist attraction for those who dont know) which has a 10 ft tall copper Viking statue in the lobby. One day when i was on admissions an american family came in. While they were buying their tickets the daughter of the family (id say about 15/16) asked 'excuse me, but do you see that statue of the Viking over there?', I said I did, 'Well is that actually how tall they were?', to which I burst out laughing, thinking she was making a funny, but was greeted by a stony faced look of confusion. I had to explain to the poor simpleton that they were actually human, and not some mythical giant type beings. what a spa...

 

[Wicker]

students, eh? is there anything they can do?

Students, they just never learn .....

 

[telford collier]

one time i was buying a sandwich and asked for some red onions in it.
this scobie standing beside me gave me a filthy look, as if this were the stupidest thing he ever heard and proceeded to ask for purple onions in his.

what a fool i am!

 

[Ex-User (250)]

one time i was buying a sandwich and asked for some red onions in it.
this scobie standing beside me gave me a filthy look, as if this were the stupidest thing he ever heard and proceeded to ask for purple onions in his.

what a fool i am!

do you know skinnerchinner?

 

[Cormcolash]

I used to work in Dvblinia (lame tourist attraction for those who dont know) which has a 10 ft tall copper Viking statue in the lobby. One day when i was on admissions an american family came in. While they were buying their tickets the daughter of the family (id say about 15/16) asked 'excuse me, but do you see that statue of the Viking over there?', I said I did, 'Well is that actually how tall they were?', to which I burst out laughing, thinking she was making a funny, but was greeted by a stony faced look of confusion. I had to explain to the poor simpleton that they were actually human, and not some mythical giant type beings. what a spa...

Haha brilliant!

 

[Phil]

"I seen yer new one the other day...ah, he's bleedin' massive!"

"ah yeh, where'd ye see him?"

"yer mot showed me him the other day...tiny little yoke, he is."

 

[Eddie Gorilla]

I remember waitin for a train with a few of da boyzzz with some fella we were certain was a drug dealer standin beside us. When the train finally arrived he got on the same carriage as us and since it was fuckin packed we (me,da boyzzz an' da possible dealer)all ended up standin between carriages. After about ten minutes his phone rang...

"Alrigh' man, stawry?...Wha?!...Ya serious?!...Fuck man, musta been some heavy shit!...Aw fuck....fuck man....fuck fuck fuck,i may ring the tazmanian devil an' make sure hes not in a fuckin coma!...Later man!"

 

[moc]

wish i was called the tazmanian devil. that'd be cool, what a great cartoon that was.

 

[Phil]

Taz was retarded. It isn't nice to laugh at the retarded.

 

[Super Dexta]

Taz was retarded. It isn't nice to laugh at the retarded.

i went to school with a guy called taz
bejaysus but he was an awful spa altogether

 

[portrid]

Overheard at prole school gates:

"Is yoor ma wi him??"

"Yeh he's me new da!"

"Ah he's a dedlee da - I had him last year!"

 

[Unicron]

Taz was retarded. It isn't nice to laugh at the retarded.

 

[Beanstalk]

http://www.overheardindublin.com/index.php

 

[egg_]

Friend of mine was a guide in Connemara National Park for a few years, and was asked by some middle-aged woman whether the frog she was showing the group was a deer

 

[broken arm]

"if lester picket put a picket outside the white house he'd turn it black"