KokaneeCowgirl
New Member
I like Lord Damo's format so here goes:
2 years old: drove around on large plastic toy car at high speeds and consequently fell down concrete stairs and broke nose. I still remember seeing my mother and grandmother's looks of horror as I tumbled.
4 years old: shoved one of my mother's contact lenses into my eye and it got stuck in the outer corner of my eye under the skin and it took ages of my parents holding me down and coaxing it to remove it. Got a right rollicking.
5 years old: Fired my babysitter because she wouldn't let me out to play. She was 16 at the time and not very bright, so she rang my mother (who was at work) in tears saying that she had to go because I fired her. I felt particularly powerful until my mother came home and I got a spanking. Then I called her a bitch under my breath even though I didn't know what a bitch was, and she got even madder.
7 years old: Got into fight with older brother (11 years old) and before bed that evening dumped loads of shite at the foot of his bed under the blanket: eggs, corn flakes, bleach, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, flour, pee, etc. I put his blanket back and waited in the dark in my room with the door slightly open to watch things kick off. He went to bed and a minute or two later I hear him scream like a banshee and as he runs past my room to my mother, I see his legs are the colour of shampoo and bleach and flour and he leaves cornflake footprints all over the carpet. I denied all knowledge.
I could go on.
2 years old: drove around on large plastic toy car at high speeds and consequently fell down concrete stairs and broke nose. I still remember seeing my mother and grandmother's looks of horror as I tumbled.
4 years old: shoved one of my mother's contact lenses into my eye and it got stuck in the outer corner of my eye under the skin and it took ages of my parents holding me down and coaxing it to remove it. Got a right rollicking.
5 years old: Fired my babysitter because she wouldn't let me out to play. She was 16 at the time and not very bright, so she rang my mother (who was at work) in tears saying that she had to go because I fired her. I felt particularly powerful until my mother came home and I got a spanking. Then I called her a bitch under my breath even though I didn't know what a bitch was, and she got even madder.
7 years old: Got into fight with older brother (11 years old) and before bed that evening dumped loads of shite at the foot of his bed under the blanket: eggs, corn flakes, bleach, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, flour, pee, etc. I put his blanket back and waited in the dark in my room with the door slightly open to watch things kick off. He went to bed and a minute or two later I hear him scream like a banshee and as he runs past my room to my mother, I see his legs are the colour of shampoo and bleach and flour and he leaves cornflake footprints all over the carpet. I denied all knowledge.
I could go on.
