Meeting People / Aspergers (3 Viewers)

[Diddles]

I did say common interests, not just music. Music is important for slightly different reasons.

I think you're on your own little tangent and there's no talking to you. I'm not saying music is a sole issue either, but it's you that keeps going on about it so I used it as an example. Myself and my husband have lots of separate interests and also lots of common ones. What I am trying to say to you, without much success, is that having presumptions about other people will guarantee that you will never have any common interests, as you will never get to know them properly.

Because it takes time, perseverance and hard work to get to know someone. Some people will turn out to be a waste of your time but some won't. If you're not prepared to bother your bollix you won't get anywhere.

 

[Jill Hives]

Because it takes time, perseverance and hard work to get to know someone. Some people will turn out to be a waste of your time but some won't. If you're not prepared to bother your bollix you won't get anywhere.

That's spot on advice for anyone.

 

[Green Goblin]

Thats absolute bullshit. I work with people with aspergers and have several friends with aspergers also who are all cool, bubbly people. yes they are diffuculty starting a conversation but its not impossible. I think you need to stop blaming your disability for everything honestly and start looking at the other issues that may be holding you back from meeting someone. Alot of people have pointed out valid reasons and good suggestions for meeting people. Do you have a set answer in mind that you're waiting for someone to suggest that you keep saying none of the suggestions are any use to you?

suggestions are that.... suggestions, noone is forcing you to take them. that said noone is forcing you to tell everyone their advice is useless either

You are aware there's varying degrees of aspergers, as well as a spectrum of different symptoms?

Some aspergers people may have no problem, but it'd still be cruel to presume they can do it.

I'm pretty angry at your response in general. Fuck you. I'm not blaming anything on my disability, I'm just pointing out what I know I can and can't do for whatever reason. There's no point lying to myself about my limitations and making an ass out of myself.

I don't like you because you almost seemed reasonable one minute and then pull this. Fuck off.

 

[Pedronimus]

I HAVE IT.

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(Yes, I do watch this shite.)

 

[Wobbler]

That's spot on advice for anyone.

No it's not. It's terrible advice. All the advice on this thread is terrible advice given by pricks. And I don't see why you get so pissed off when Green Goblin says your advice is terrible. It's all one big circle jerk anyway.
Edit:Fuck you

 

[Shorty]

Isn't any form of behavioral therapy going to involve some level of self overcoming? As such, challenging characteristics common to Aspergers like "restricted and repetitive interests" could perhaps be done by broadening musical tastes and interests?

 

[dleacht]

I don't like you because you almost seemed reasonable one minute and then pull this. Fuck off.

You don't like me because I tried to be reasonable with you then read the abuse you were giving to other people and I changed my mind about you? So you dont like me for doing the same thing you've just done to me, that doesnt make any sense.

I'm aware of aspergers, I've been reading your posts for a while also and think you contradict yourself a lot

 

[Wobbler]

Isn't any form of behavioral therapy going to involve some level of self overcoming? As such, challenging characteristics common to Aspergers like "restricted and repetitive interests" could perhaps be done by broadening musical tastes and interests?

No. Fuck off.

This is fun

 

[Green Goblin]

No it's not. It's terrible advice. All the advice on this thread is terrible advice given by pricks. And I don't see why you get so pissed off when Green Goblin says your advice is terrible. It's all one big circle jerk anyway.
Edit:Fuck you

asshat. That wasn't even funny. Taking random phrases out of my posts and word salading them together to make a mockery out of them is something you get on fucking gameFAQs.

 

[wild_cat]

How do you propose someone with aspergers talks to strangers in a pub?


Most people can get away with those things because their interests are far more likely to be shared by the people they meet.

My friend that has aspergers is one of the most out going people ever, but like everything everyone is different. He has a thing for blonde D4 heads, therefore he loves coppers. He is very interested in horslips, not to many D4 head girls listen to horslips so he came to a compremise. So its easy enough for him. An ex of mine had aspergers to, he was grand except he only loved one band and everything I listened to was shit to him. Infact we had nothing in common but he made me laugh me arse off the whole time.


When I was younger I was REALLY REALLY into riot grrl and getting angry. Not many guys in wexford had those interests. Personally I wouldnt have wanted to go out with some one with those interests as I like being shown new things even if I do shoot them down.

Now the only interests I have are newstalk, the daily mail and shite electro so thank god I learned that going out with people who have different interests is really good.

 

[Green Goblin]

This gives me plenty reason to think you're full of shit:

Thats absolute bullshit. I work with people with aspergers and have several friends with aspergers also who are all cool, bubbly people. yes they are diffuculty starting a conversation but its not impossible. I think you need to stop blaming your disability for everything honestly and start looking at the other issues that may be holding you back from meeting someone.

Your whole post had a pretty nasty tone to it, it was the same shit I'd spent the last 12000 pages saying NO to plus the whole "Oh this guy I know with aspergers isn't like that, stop using it as an excuse" you get all the fucking time which shows your lack of understanding at the matter of hand, so shut the fuck up. Aspergers like autism is a spectrum disorder. People use "friends with aspergers" as an excuse as much as anyone uses Aspergers itself as an excuse.

Plus you ignored the actual content of my post in favour of getting 100% defensive, whereas I actually left room for a real reply. I don't like you. I'm getting sick and tired of this shit. I don't like you, I think what you have to say is stupid, and I'm sick of BS posts making fun of me or tearing into me just because I think a popular way of thinking is stupid.

 

[classic seanc]

I am contributing to this thread.

 

[FiFi_LaRue]

Green Goblin, the only person on this forum who knows and understand your condition and how it affects you personally, is you. We cannot be expected to give advice if the only guidance you give us is the type of music you want the people you meet, to be into and the fact that you have aspergers.

All people here are probably trying to base their advice on is perhaps things they read on Wikipedia etc.

You have to better explain the types of things you've done to try and meet people and why they may not have worked for you and also if you give us examples of times you did meet people and why they were successful.

The thing is most people don't have aspergers, or other disabilities and unfortunately and this is me speaking as someone with experience of
not fitting in for reasons I won't get into here, you do have to adapt how you act and react to others to what people perceive to be "the norm". You do have to put yourself out there, get out of a comfort zone, force yourself to interact with people even though the fear of rejection, or fear of them judging you is incredibly strong.

Supposing you do see the person of your dreams, how do you propose meeting them?

As others have suggested you will have to eventually get out of your online comfort zone. There is going to have to be some real life contact with people at some stage, particularly if you meet the person you have so rigidly defined above, how will you overcome this when the situation arises?

Like I said, the only person who knows your condition and it's effects on you, is you! You can't really expect a bunch of strangers on the internet to tailor advice specific to you as a result.

 

[Diddles]

You are aware there's varying degrees of aspergers, as well as a spectrum of different symptoms?

Some aspergers people may have no problem, but it'd still be cruel to presume they can do it.

I'm pretty angry at your response in general. Fuck you. I'm not blaming anything on my disability, I'm just pointing out what I know I can and can't do for whatever reason. There's no point lying to myself about my limitations and making an ass out of myself.

I don't like you because you almost seemed reasonable one minute and then pull this. Fuck off.

You're the one going on and on about having Asperger's and having a disability. No one else is. Look back on your posts.

Stop defining yourself by your Asperger's. Carrying it around like a cross won't help you. Using that as your starting point will get you nowhere.

 

[Green Goblin]

Green Goblin, the only person on this forum who knows and understand your condition and how it affects you personally, is you. We cannot be expected to give advice if the only guidance you give us is the type of music you want the people you meet, to be into and the fact that you have aspergers.

That doesn't really give people an excuse to be pushy advice when they recieve some good indication it doesn't apply. It's not lack of knowledge, it's lack of willingness to learn.

 

[Franco]

Have a wank.

 

[Green Goblin]

You're the one going on and on about having Asperger's and having a disability. No one else is. Look back on your posts.

Stop defining yourself by your Asperger's. Carrying it around like a cross won't help you. Using that as your starting point will get you nowhere.

You unbelievable twat.

I'm not blaming anything on my disability, I'm just pointing out what I know I can and can't do for whatever reason. There's no point lying to myself about my limitations and making an ass out of myself.

Did you miss that you quoted this in your post? This is a great retort to "Stop defining yourself by your Asperger's. Carrying it around like a cross won't help you.". You made a post that was already refuted by what you were quoting. How incredibly hamfistedly stupid can you get?

I'm getting sick of this. Anytime anyone mentions the limitations of a condition they have, or their social skills in general, out comes some loudmouthed dumbfuck with no clue and the DON'T BLAME EVERYTHING ON YOUR CONDITION HURR.

Well, what horrible condition do you have to blame your extreme ignorance and stupidity on exactly?

I've had enough of you twats.

 

[Wobbler]

Bye

 

[dleacht]

I've had enough of you twats.[/QUOTE]

Then why do you keep replying?

 

[nlgbbbblth]

I'm gonna call it a night too