neverending story the next generation (1 Viewer)

[pad]

then came in Emily's cat Bagpuss The most Important The most Beautiful The most Magical Saggy old cloth cat in the whole wide world and he said...

 

[crazy dick]

my christ, have i got an itchy willy!

i really have.

bagpuss hadn't washed himself since his show was cancelled back in the day and with that he gave his willy a lick.

thats better ,"said Bagpuss", said the bagpuss narrator.

Garda O'Shaughnessy who had a penchant for pink and white catz brought him home.
"you can finish up this investigation Garda Howie b"

yes sir..................you big puffter, a ha, a ha haaaaaaaaaaaa, mwahaaaaaaaa mwahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa mwahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa mwahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. little do you realise i Phillip Schofield have resumed the role of howie and joined the gards, a plan so fiendishly cunning, so...........waitaminute thats fuckin stupid,what the fuck is that about,i must have been really forgetful when i thought of that....i'm the bad guy!

i'm goin for a wank.......

 

[MartyMcFly]

then out jumped Anto upon Howie B's back brandishing his flicknife, and posing the question "if there's a queer on your back would you pull him off?" a bemused Howie B considers his options and the relevant answers he could give without sounding gay or homophobic, but before he could answer Anto started ranting.

"See, me flicknife was bestowed upon me by a beautiful naked goddess, who had been bathing in the Grand Canal (or should I say floating, upside down, rather motionless, with the aforementioned flicknife sticking out of the base of her neck, where her necklace does close).

But anyway the most important think is to focus, especially during times of horrible brutal murder, as it probably woz me bro Deco who did it, cause that slut woz after a good slappin for what she did on new years night which woz...............


(I like the use of bttf plot lines)
(PS all the bttf movies are good)

 

[Willie Willions]

...And then, wow, they had somehow arrived at roscommon...

 

[crazy dick]

"happy Christmas"

 

[the pibblious one]

" and god bless us, each an' every one" said tiny tim as I satrted to weep (again)....

 

[pad]

i was wondering when this would start again.

 

[the pibblious one]

- said mr pibb, as he tried to stem the flow with a handkerchief

 

[NEGROID!]

enter george harrison "alright boys?"
"harrison!, butbut... you're dead!" said a shocked pibb.
"fuck sake, settle cax will ye? call me harrow, and i'm not dead cause this story is set last week".
"fair enough" replied the entire cast.

 

[silo]

...of the 'locust fans read it and weep' thread on the messageboard of some obscure website for pricks.

they were then all removed from the storyline with a swift mass-execution, TQ-style.

then there was a brief pause for reflection before someone launched a war on afghanis... sorry, before everyone realised that people have been changing their pictures and i.p. addresses and shit on the same aforementioned website for pricks. and germ no longer existed. then someone introduced ian dempsey as a new character into the story, cos it seemed appropriate at the time, along with the efforts to bring the thread up to date with dead beatles and whatnot...

'hello!' said ian. 'i'd just like to say that...'

 

[lothaar]

i love you Zig. Love you with a throbbing passion that knows no bounds and can only be supported by a 20 foot industrial crane because of the excess...

 

[NEGROID!]

space provided in these xworx jeans, now lets go upstairs and fuck".
dempsey and zig bailed upstairs but both of their boners were send into the ground when they found silo in the bedroom being sucked off by his own ma. "ah" said silo, "i needed that".

 

[Bonzo]

suddenly there was a cataclysmic ending of the universe ended and they all died...

 

[the pibblious one]

-or so they thought. WHat had actually happened was a fatal scientific phenomenon know as 'the gush' Silo had in fact ejaculated to death while spraying the entire room with funk juice. Zig, dempsey, silo's ma and bonzo all wiped their eyes to discover that they were very much alive. But their sight would not last much longer. Silo's venereal disease was already working on their eyes.....

 

[t0mred]

before them stood the one and only Pat Kenny.

"Pat, What the fuck?"

they said.

"Welcome to Heaven, Ian." said Pat
"For yay, I am God and all I say is righteous and good."

He is the God-man, The God-Pat Kenny

Then in typical fashion, Pat turned around to say something he thought would be very funny and intelligent sounding, but of course, It wasn't and couldn't have been any worse then..........

 

[Willie Willions]

don't ask me, my last posting was shite

 

[the pibblious one]

-said eoin, who made a typically brechtian enterance into the scene. 'what the fuck are ye talkin about, ye muppet' said zig, ironically. 'i'm losing my sight' said zig. 'that'll be the v.d. then'. 'sorry said' silo's ma,' i passed that on to him last week' Each one tried to enjoy thier last few minutes of sight when suddenly....

 

[NEGROID!]

hinkle, wiersma and jurs (authors of the fourth edition of "applied statistics for the behavioural sciences") came crashing through the ceiling killing everyone beneath them.
"another fine mess you've got us into hinkle" said jurs as he slapped him across the back of the head.
"meep!" said the tearfull hinkle.
a silence filled the room. all three men exited stage left.
the crowd gave a massive applause. then they all left the theatre leaving only our hero tony esticle to clean up the mess before the next performance.
end of chapter 112354325623665464574376537.

 

[crazy dick]

Chapter 17

a small boy strolls nonchalantly across the dusty dancefloor, a torrent of dust wisping away to some unkown place behind him. its been years since you've been there. and now you've found some better place. and i miss you like the heavens miss the rain, and i miss you like the heavens missed the rain.

the boy looked back at the path that he had tread. had he really walked that far?

yes

yes he had.

end chapter 17

 

[NEGROID!]

enter east 17...

"Baby if you've got to go away don't think I could take the pain,
won't you stay another day?
Oh don't leave me alone like this,
don't you say it's the final kiss,
won't you stay another day?

Don't you know we've come too far now,
just to go and try to throw it all away.
Thought I heard you say you love me,
that your love was gonna be here to stay.
I've only just begun to know you,
all I can say is won't you stay just one more day?

I touch your face while you are sleeping
and hold your hand,
don't understand what's going on.
Good times we had return to haunt me,
though it's for you,
all that I do seems to be wrong."

said tony mortimer.