Football Thread (1 Viewer)

[old]

Entirely hilarious:

Shelbourne have no worries about playing against Vinnie Jones in a friendly.

Jones has agreed to play as a guest for Carlisle in Dublin.

"He's not a hard man, he's a pansy - and I would say that to his face," Shelbourne chief executive Ollie Byrne told Ananova.com.

"He's not a hard man. He played for Leeds in a friendly against us and he had to be taken off for his own protection. He could not look after himself.

"It's a much more physical game here, you don't get as much time on the ball."

And if Jones is thinking of putting the squeeze on Shelbourne's players, as he did against Paul Gascoigne, Byrne has a message for him: "He's going to need a bigger pair of hands if he wants to grab some of our players!"

Jones is playing as he is a close friend of Carlisle manager Roddy Collins. Curtis Fleming and former Manchester United defender Paul McGrath could also play for Carlisle.

The game is part of the deal that took Shelbourne's Richie Foran to Carlisle.

A percentage of the gate receipts are to be donated to former St Patrick's star Christie McElligott, who at 31 recently lost his legs in a road accident.

McElligot played in the same side as Foran at St Pats and is a close friend of United manager Roddy Collins and Middlesbrough's Curtis Fleming.

McGrath may not be able to play because of injury.

from http://football.guardian.co.uk

 

[the bearded lady]

oh dear,

they'll all start droppin' now......

such a waste of humanity.

sniff........

 

[rocktopus]

arent the Strokes deadly, and thew white stripes and indie shite in general and...
oh- this is a sports thread
sorry

 

[Hector Grey]

Turdsday the Umpteenth of Dogmember has been chose for our first 'Breath Nothing Day'. Finally we get to stick it the running pig dog lacky's of the bourgoise imperialist capitalist scum but not breathing their tainted Nestle air. Activities arranged for the day will in clude Face Painting (blue mostly. not using paint) and there will be a prize for the most hilarious death. Soon we will all live in pockets of sulphur under sea. long live the revalation.

 

[fake working class]

Hector Grey (14 Nov, 2001 11:15 a.m.):
Turdsday the Umpteenth of Dogmember has been chose for our first 'Breath Nothing Day'. Finally we get to stick it the running pig dog lacky's of the bourgoise imperialist capitalist scum but not breathing their tainted Nestle air. Activities arranged for the day will in clude Face Painting (blue mostly. not using paint) and there will be a prize for the most hilarious death. Soon we will all live in pockets of sulphur under sea. long live the revalation.

jesus hector, i'm REALLY starting to fall in love with you. you are the funniest, most sarcy bitter fuck on hag's earth.
what's eating you, daddy?
hey, did the path to self-rightousness not let you into his gang of one either?
yeah, me too....sigh.

still, i think we should go to the shops that day, cos the merchant scum will be a-beggin' for our money when they think the bottoms dropped out of their markets and they'll give us loads a 10p's offa stuff cos they'll be glad o' the bidnez! also, i'm boycottin' indie/thumped consumer goods - fashion wear/food/music cos i think the multinationals are loosing too much money and the balance of economic power might tip into the evil hands of the third world types and then god's holy americans won't be able to save us anymore when people start messin' with us!!

 

[Ex-User (250)]

note to self: it is possible to say 'take part in' critical mass because you honestly belive that bikes are better than cars and at the same time not shop in hobo.

note to self: everything starts somewhere.

note to self: must stop being the kind of person i'm trying to slag.

note to self: must stop feeling old and making sweeping statments about 'youth culture' or what i think it might be.

note to self: how did i start off being so funny and end up so retarded.

note to self: prick.

 

[pee pee]

where's the football you fucking girls?

 

[Hector Grey]

ah, football. esperanto of youth, ballet of the working man, theatre of the dispossesed. ah. a conundrum with in a conundrum.

 

[shambo]

2 facts, 1 prediction.
1.was at that friendly match between shels and Leeds, one of the most boring ever, hardly any football played.

2. "So far, so good" by liam brady was the first book i ever read!

prediction:
Ireland to catch Iran on the break and win 1-0? ambitious perhaps.

 

[fake working class]

note to self: pull hag off in the crowd the next time he's watching the dudley corporation.
note to self: love hag more (if possible)

 

[old]

more stuff ripped from somewhere else

One Iranian reporter asked: "Please be honest, what has really happened to Gary Kelly?" A bemused McCarthy replied: "You tell me - he's just had his lunch and now he's upstairs having a sleep. He's fine, isn't he?" And it did not stop there, with McCarthy forced to explain why someone from Barnsley - himself - should be involved with the Republic in the first place and then, most illogically of all, invited to share his views on Cyprus.

The entertainment was held up when a cameraman's spotlight burst into flames but reached a surreal high when Robbie Keane turned up and was promptly mistaken for his more famous namesake Roy. "You are a hero to lots of children," one chap told him. "You are like Hercules."
"Well . . . what can I say?" said Keane, embarrassed. "Thanks very much."

 

[Anne OMalley]

more stuff ripped from somewhere else

Pure genius. "The 12 Labours of Robbie and/or Roy Keane", by Omar Sin-Bin Pele Ali.

joss (14 Nov, 2001 02:11 p.m.):
One Iranian reporter asked: "Please be honest, what has really happened to Gary Kelly?" A bemused McCarthy replied: "You tell me - he's just had his lunch and now he's upstairs having a sleep. He's fine, isn't he?" And it did not stop there, with McCarthy forced to explain why someone from Barnsley - himself - should be involved with the Republic in the first place and then, most illogically of all, invited to share his views on Cyprus.

The entertainment was held up when a cameraman's spotlight burst into flames but reached a surreal high when Robbie Keane turned up and was promptly mistaken for his more famous namesake Roy. "You are a hero to lots of children," one chap told him. "You are like Hercules."
"Well . . . what can I say?" said Keane, embarrassed. "Thanks very much."

 

[Monkey]

"It's a much more physical game here, you don't get as much time on the ball." - that's because they are too shit to hold onto it

 

[old]

After 2 years of Tolka Park matches, I think this is mostly true.

35 minutes... so excited...

 

[pete]

please tell me this thread won't degenerate into a running commentary of the match

please

 

[Stuart Little]

what's the score now?

was that a hand ball?

the ref's a prick.

that was never offside etc....

 

[Unclealo]

Stewart Little (15 Nov, 2001 02:44 p.m.):
what's the score now?
quote]

Well, sneaking off from work for a few pints (and the match) certainly rocks...

 

[Hector Grey]

christ. fucking iranians...w hy couldn't they have scored with half an hour to go and not half a minute. then there might have been some tension. as it was i was bored. bored cos i couldn't have a scoop and bored cos i've considered it a forgone conclusion since we fought back from 1-0 down against mighty andorra to notch up an historic win. doesn't help of course that the boozer in my place of employ is like a room made of lego with all the atmosphere of hags trousers. still, world cup is world fuckin cup. up yours holland.

i'm prolly the last person left in work, aint i?

 

[old]

Nah. I'm still in work too.
Thirstin' for a booze but too skint to go out.
At least I can daydream about Richard Dunne as Hot Shot Hamish out east, knocking defenders out of the way with his Honey Monster style girth before blasting shots that burst the nets each time.
I predict this magical transformation.

 

[the bearded lady]

prick.