Big Brother 8 (1 Viewer)

[Wilbert]

I hate them already. I mean, look at the heads on them!

 

[old]

Very loosely related, from Mediaguardian:

Spoof blog parody of young controller is the talk of television



[FONT=Geneva,Arial,sans-serif] James Silver
Saturday June 9, 2007
The Guardian

[/FONT] The anonymous author of a spoof blog, supposedly written by the controller of BBC3, Danny Cohen, has become the Scarlet Pimpernel of the television industry. With its close-to-the-bone bitchiness, toe-curling depiction of programme commissioning meetings and walk-on parts for several well-known industry figures, The Secret Blog of a TV Controller, aged 33, has transfixed many in the industry.However, despite feverish finger-pointing, the author's identity remains a closely-guarded secret. "Everybody has become slightly obsessed with finding out who writes it," says an independent producer, who declined to be named. "The way it's written is extremely unflattering and if I were Danny Cohen, I would be mortified." Initial postings appeared soon after 33-year-old Cohen left his job as head of youth channel E4 to become controller of BBC3 in April, under a headline declaring that it was "the first blog about the TV industry penned by a true TV insider - Me ... the youngest channel controller in the history of British television".
In early entries the author describes how he wants "every female presenter [he's] ever fantasized about, starting with Anneka Rice" to appear on his channel and frets that his goatee beard, which he thinks lends him "the air of a maverick risk-taker", will not be ready by the time he starts his new job.
Subsequent highlights include an encounter with the BBC's "scary diversity lady", and how he spent "20 minutes perving over Paris Hilton".
The blog is plainly a spoof, but its arrival sent a ripple of panic through the industry. "When it kicked off, I had lots of emails flying around from various clients saying 'This is a bit too close to home, can you find out who's behind it?'" says PR boss James Herring, one of the few "real people" to appear in the blog and one who gets a suspiciously good press.
One name to crop up frequently, in inquiries by the Guardian, is the writer and broadcaster, Charlie Brooker. But Brooker greets the suggestion with bemused laughter. "People keep asking if I write it and I tell them that I just don't know enough about the politics of TV," he says. "Whoever is doing it clearly has an axe to grind [with Cohen] as well as a lot of spare time. I have neither. There's also something quite nasty about the way it's written."
A TV producer, who speaks on condition of anonymity, claims he knows who the author is, but refuses to name names. "I can tell you that it's two people. One of them works in the vicinity of Danny Cohen's office at the BBC and that person feeds information to someone who writes it, who's actually at Channel 4. One of them is a former colleague of Danny's."
Why does he think Cohen, who declined to comment, has been singled out? "It's partly his age, but also Danny's arrogant and he's pissed off a few people."
Thetvcontroller

 

[La La]

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[Wilbert]

jesus christ

I shuddered when it was revealed that after a shower he dries himself with a hair dryer rather than a towel!

 

[CinnamonBoy]

jesus christ

SURELY he's taking the piss?

 

[Goff]

SURELY he's taking the piss?

No. I reckon he's serious. Like all the rest of those fucking nutters.


The only half-decent one is Tracey cos she seems to just smile all the time. Manically. But at least she seems to be not taking it too seriously.

Can't wait till she blows her top at the other loons.

That black one is a geebag. The usual, he-nominated-me-so-I'll-get-one-of-the-other-thicks-to-attack-him.

Ah, BB. I still can't get into this one. It's just dull.

 

[sweetoblivion]

what's the story with yer man seany? Haven't seen an episode since friday night but he game across as a bit of a tool - he was rather unfriendly to the other new dude.

 

[sweetoblivion]

do you have to be insane to go on big brother?

 

[Wilbert]

No. I reckon he's serious. Like all the rest of those fucking nutters.


The only half-decent one is Tracey cos she seems to just smile all the time. Manically. But at least she seems to be not taking it too seriously.

Can't wait till she blows her top at the other loons.

That black one is a geebag. The usual, he-nominated-me-so-I'll-get-one-of-the-other-thicks-to-attack-him.

Ah, BB. I still can't get into this one. It's just dull.

You are such a racialist!

 

[killy kill]

Tracys masticating is testament to the quality of yokes in late 80s/early 90s britain.
i want to like her but i can't, all that 'avin' it bollocks

 

[sweetoblivion]

i wonder how she'll survive with no drugs in the house?!

 

[killy kill]

She smuggled acid soaked into her tampons or so the tabloids say...'av it.

 

[Diddles]

She smuggled acid soaked into her tampons or so the tabloids say...'av it.

She also has a secret compartment in her chin.

 

[Wilbert]

She also has a secret compartment in her chin.

Does anyone else think of Jimmy Saville when they look at her?

Just me then.

 

[La La]

Does anyone else think of Jimmy Saville when they look at her?

Just me then.

i think of worzel gummidge. im sure im not alone

 

[Wilbert]

i think of worzel gummidge. im sure im not alone

Thats it!!!

She obviously only took her 'gurning' head with her to the house.

 

[La La]

Thats it!!!

She obviously only took her 'gurning' head with her to the house.

it's odd though because she's the token 'madser' and yet she's one of the quieter, likeable housemates.

*for the record, i stopped watching after those two news guys joined. it's boring now. i promise. i dont watch it anymore. juat the occasional highlight on youtube. i swear. i dont watch. im not addicted.

 

[Wilbert]

it's odd though because she's the token 'madser' and yet she's one of the quieter, likeable housemates.

*for the record, i stopped watching after those two news guys joined. it's boring now. i promise. i dont watch it anymore. juat the occasional highlight on youtube. i swear. i dont watch. im not addicted.

True.

I saw that Seany guy when he went in and I found myself wondering if I could somehow get into the house and thump him and get back out without anyone but me and Seany knowing what happened.

 

[evil bandit]

i think of worzel gummidge. im sure im not alone

Yeah she's a hybrid of Worzel Gummidge and Tyres from Spaced.

 

[Wilbert]

Yeah she's a hybrid of Worzel Gummidge and Tyres from Spaced.

How did I not make this connection before?

Excellent work, Mr Bandit.