Very important new thread about nothing. (1 Viewer)

silo

Active Member
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May 1, 2001
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Ok. The idea is that we have to keep this thread going without talking specifically about anything at all. Seeing as there are many skilled practitioners of the art of aimless waffle here, most obviously those in komputery-type leave-the-internet-on-all-day jobs ('twould appear), this shouldn't pose too much of a problem. (In fact, for bbs members whose stock-in-trade is ironic waffle and meaningless non-sequiturs, the real problem here will be what to write in order to be able to give a disinterested, ironic tone to your reply while deliberately avoiding doing what the thread asks you to in line with the anti-authoritarian impulse of most here). On your marks, get set...
 
ESTRAGON:
(despairingly). Ah! (Pause.) You're sure it was here?
VLADIMIR:
What?
ESTRAGON:
That we were to wait.
VLADIMIR:
He said by the tree. (They look at the tree.) Do you see any others?
ESTRAGON:
What is it?
VLADIMIR:
I don't know. A willow.
ESTRAGON:
Where are the leaves?
VLADIMIR:
It must be dead.
ESTRAGON:
No more weeping.
VLADIMIR:
Or perhaps it's not the season.
ESTRAGON:
Looks to me more like a bush.
VLADIMIR:
A shrub.
ESTRAGON:
A bush.
VLADIMIR:
A—. What are you insinuating? That we've come to the wrong place?
 
BENEFITS
• Be able to distinguish between strategic, business and service plans, and where each fits into the performance management process
• Understand the concept of service planning and its background
• Appreciate the importance of realistic service plans
in achieving the organisations aims
• Know the key elements and steps involved in service planning and in monitoring implementation
• Appreciate the need to adopt a multi-disciplinary approach to service planning
• Appreciate the organisational and cultural changes accompanying successful service planning
• Have considered your own contribution to developing and implementing service plans
 
Most monkeys like bananas, but only Monkichi can eat ten bananas in one minute! Our perky primate celebrates his birthday on January 13th. He lives high in the mountains with all his friends, including his best friend, Monta. Monta is quite a bit smaller than Monkichi and can outrun any monkey around. This helps because Monta loves to play tricks on all of his monkey friends, except Monkichi. Monkichi loves keeping his friends entertained with stories, jokes and poems. His dream is to one day be a poet or maybe a professional comedian.
 
..and so she ate the youghurt, the one they had warned her about. She fell to the floor graping her stomach, she said, "man this cant be happening theres too muhc to live for tell amy and johnny that i love them both but i have only one regret that i never.....". She slumps on the floor DEAD
 
hi. my name is packie............and im an alcohlic......{applause}

well done packie...is there any one else?

well yes.... my name is roger. i.......well um..........i play with barbie dolls. and i have a personal vendetta with ken. hes so 1981!

okay........well you just get your stuff and leave. thank you. and all the other barbofreaks can feck off aswell.

a chorus of "a for sufferinmaryanjesus's" breaks out and the meeting disbanded!
 
..and he thought how many times must i try to get dressed with my eyes cloeed as he woke up for work at 6:30 am, or the ten cigarettes and 20 cups of tea he smoked just so he coudl raise a weee smile for the people he meeted everyday. He looked out the window and spotted a small furry sheep, his sadness turned to joy and he threw the fake sheep rug off the floor onto his back and taped it with masking tape, he then phoned into wrok with a sore throat and went off to bounce around the field with the other sheep, this is living he thought...
 
a once we went to fields a toffing
a-toffing toffing o
be lately come but never boffing
troffing to and fro
a squeel we heard yet never sought
it's meaning frail the hay
changing rooms and mailing fooms
tiddle traydle fray
 
we strummed his guitar and thought when will rock n roll become the new rock n roll, or when will red become the new black, he always liked the colour red, and moreso the movie the colour purple, but he had put £20 on in paddy powers for red to become the new black before christmad 2001, will he succeed, cosmo thinks not...
 
arse arse arse arse arsea rscarsdfdflaifhgadfljgns;dflnbslfknbs'lkjb'slrkmnh'kgjbslkgjh[irtjhpsijhgswlktjstjpsit'pirtjyprtihjseiptjpthj['rtij'ritjh'rtdhfghdfghdfghdfghdfghdfghdfghdfghfghjp;ritjh'rpithgsrltijhspitjperhgfhdfudfghdfghdfghdfg0dgfhdfghgdfghfghdfgytkruyrtueiurthwn voeht whoeruhg ouhegpuoiehg pojfng speogh peohg eruhgpoeuhg pohgeouhgejyljnt;soidfupbodhtljy wnb;s ldoifhg;sorh bdtyh sdth'sh s
s sligel
ds
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd arse arse arse arse arse arse arse arse arse ARSE!!!!!!!..................
 
Aching, inflamed joints, anal or genital sores with fungus infection, anaphylaxis (life-threatening allergic reaction), anemia, appetite loss, blurry vision, bulging of soft spots in infants' heads, decreased hearing, diarrhea, difficulty swallowing, discoloration of children's teeth, fever, fluid retention, headache, hepatitis, hives, inflammation of the penis, inflammation of the intestines, inflammation of the tongue, joint pain, kidney or liver failure, nausea, rash, sensitivity to light, skin coloration, skin eruptions, skin inflammation and peeling, throat irritation, thyroid gland problems, vomiting
 
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

So I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaaaah." I said "Why?" He said "My dog's died."

"So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said "Who's speaking please?" And a voice said "You are."

"So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said "Is that the local swimming baths?" He said "It depends where you're calling from."

"So I rang up a local building firm, I said "I want a skip outside my house." He said "I'm not stopping you."

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it's Colin.
 
A bloke goes to his doctor and says "Doctor, it hurts whenever i put my left arm over my head like this.", and the doctor says "Well don't do it then".
 

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21 Day Calendar

Landless: 'Lúireach' Album Launch (Glitterbeat Records)
The Unitarian Church, Stephen's Green
Dublin Unitarian Church, 112 St Stephen's Green, Dublin, D02 YP23, Ireland

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