Stupid lyrics thread. (1 Viewer)

Juno said:
...
Wtf does that mean? Are they Japanese or something?
I don't know, but apparently, my feelings are in far too concentrated a form. Or that by adding 'feelings' I somehow render the rest of me all watery and weak.

And my 'imput'!? Yeah. Substandered assessing, me hole.

If I could live 3 minutes in their lives, I'd probably use the time to teach myself to read.

I was forced to review their album a few years ago, handed it by a smirking Shay, who gave it to me because he thought I could 'do it justice', or something.

It was a joy to write. Nothing like an opportunity for unfettered vitriol.
 
ODB:
"I don't have a problem with you fuckin' me,
I do have a problem with you NOT fuckin' me"
I mean, come on, it's hardly shakespeare.
 
Ian said:
post yer review sher
Here you go. It's fecking long, so, sorry about that.

Avenged Sevenfold - Sounding the Seventh Trumpet


Applying a diverse set of influences and striving to create a unique sound does not necessarily make a band good. When it works, it is remarkable: Grade, Refused and Hot Water Music all do it with astonishingly good results. Avenged Sevenfold attempt to fuse hardcore punk and metal, also with a kind of astounding result.

The Beach Boys’ little-known and make-believe metal experiment, Hang Ten at the Gates of Hell is an unmistakable influence, while the effects of excessive amounts of vegan-rella add a touch of bowel strain that stirs even the most stubborn human empathy. Vocals shift from a fruity California Whine to the dry-mouthed barking of post-25-ta-Life metalcore and back again with no warning and, as if that weren’t enough, they’ve added interludes of the likes of Journey, Foreigner, Winger, et al, especially in ‘Warmness on the Soul’, a blatant co-dependency manifesto that makes me pity the poor woman to whom it is dedicated.

‘Streets’, while irritatingly nasal, is virtually metal-free, a sample of what these guys could sound like if they stuck with some pop-punk influenced hardcore or vice versa. The changes are probably as smooth as they could be, but if they’re trying to share their pain with the world, it works, and if you don’t buy this album, these guys will kill themselves: ‘slit my wrists, take away the pain. Slit my throat, everyone’s to blame.’ Converge plus Fat/Epitaph/Lookout punk plus a bunch of stuff from the £1.99 bin and a big musical poodle perm equals something, I just don’t know what. Whatever it is, it almost works on a couple of tracks: ‘Darkness Surrounding’ almost does the impossible, but remains unconvincing; ‘We Come out at Night’, minus the singing-through-a-snorkel bit, could almost be a decent metal song, even with the pianos and the thunderstorm in the background.

In a recent interview, Zacky Vengeance, digressing from his profanity-littered rant about the latest translation of Dante, warns the mothers of Europe to lock up their daughters, and I think he means it. The Reverend Tholomew Plague, loosely paraphrasing Thomas á Becket, sends a message to readers who can’t remember the band’s name that they might consider eating horse’s balls (though he does not explain how consumption of an equine variation of the Rocky Mountain Oyster can boost a person’s memory), while he himself expresses an interest in dabbling in cannibalism. Newest member Synyster Gates, in the same interview, uses the word ‘pussy’ 873 times before launching, unprovoked, into an argument with a random passer-by that seems to have been plagiarised almost directly from Plato’s Apologia, while Justin Sane hints that the next album may be a musical version of William Blake’s Songs of Innocence…I hope these guys at least get laid for being in a band.

Spinal Tap without the irony, and almost as much fun as a Manowar promo video (www.manowar.com). Almost. Most quotable lyric? ‘But I can’t take their soul. Punching through jello, stabbing not killing.’ Yeah, somebody’s been reading Becket.
 
ah they're crap anyway... i dont know what record you were reviewing there jane but they have a mini album, and one of the songs is this terrible 8 minute long rip off of November Rain but with all the goodness removed, leaving only 5 rich pretty boys whining... and it has the worst guitar solo ive ever heard. criminal.
 
jane said:
No, no there isn't, is there?

And anyway, posting the review was your idea.

You should see my academic shite. Fucking hell. I'm trying to write a 20 minute conference paper right now, and it's fucking killing me to get everything I have to say into less than 3000 words.

heh heh... I'm buying you a scissors...
 
ha ha.. blue..

i was listening to a lot of old blues songs, and the lyrics are terrible but the songs are so good...
like "beat me brother with a solid four" or any of the denny poulain songs... "this beat really spins my hat" and all that stuff..

almost all of elton john's 80's stuff.. jesus what were they at?

generally just completely cliched lovey stuff makes me wretch..
 
Damien Dempsey's Celtic Tiger song is probably the closest to downs-syndrome lyrics.

"Greeeeeedy, Greeeeedy, Greeeeeedy" What the fuck? Its the way he sings it too, I bet he thinks he's doin a great Bob Dylan impression or somethin. That guy is so shit, he's a shit rapist.
 
Bunny said:
Damien Dempsey's Celtic Tiger song is probably the closest to downs-syndrome lyrics.

"Greeeeeedy, Greeeeedy, Greeeeeedy" What the fuck? Its the way he sings it too, I bet he thinks he's doin a great Bob Dylan impression or somethin. That guy is so shit, he's a shit rapist.

THANK YOU. I thought i was going insane and somehow missing some enormous talent, but now i know i was right. he should be locked up
 
Alan Remorse said:
THANK YOU. I thought i was going insane and somehow missing some enormous talent, but now i know i was right. he should be locked up

I saw him live once. AAWWWWWFFFFULLL!! I heckled. How annoying, that he gets good reviews. !bog
 
my little contribution would have to be.

"you son of a bitch, you incestuous fucker, you smell of stale piss you smell like your mother"
 
Alan Remorse said:
no, it really pisses me off that the irish press take every opportunity to suck him off. YOURE NOT BILLY BRAGG YOU TWAT.
yeah, but he's not writing the articles is he? do you expect him to write to the irish times to tell them he's really just a fairly plain singer songwriter? "dear madam, all this hype about me is wrong! i don't deserve this!!"
so anyway, i'm sure he was delighted to have people at his gig telling him how crap he is and who he isn't.
i don't particularly like him, i just don't like hecklers.
 
"Her bellybutton was her mouth
Which meant she tasted what she'd speak, whoo
But the funny thing is what happened to her nose
Oooo, it grew until it reached all of her toes
Oooo, now when people say her feet smell, they mean her nose"
 

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