Quotes from your parents (1 Viewer)

[egg_]

As soon as I became a dad I started mixing up names. No joke

 

[snakybus]

Me too, Conrad.

 

[therealjohnny]

http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays

"Don't touch the bacon, it's not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i'll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing."11:15 AM Aug 22nd from web

"Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn't stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down."

"The dog is not bored, it's a fucking dog. It's not like he's waiting for me to give him a fucking rubix cube. He's a god damned dog."

 

[piratecore]

"have a shower you smell terrible"

"turn that shite down"

"are you going to be here all day"

"stop being so negative"

 

[Super Dexta]

My ma: I HATE PHILIP GLASS!!!

Props to my ma.

 

[washingcattle]

Yer ma will fucking love Steve Riech.

My auld fellas mixing up of names reached it's peak at and Ireland match at landsdowne when he tried to shout abuse at either Phil Babb or Kevin Kilbane and instead stood up and screamed KEBAB which went down a storm with the entire stand. It was the best day of my uncle and I's lives. We're still laughing now.

 

[Super Dexta]

My ma: "I think I might set up a blog"

Oh sweet jesus

 

[mark]

this is a very funny thread.

a few years ago i was attending the wedding of a mate who was getting married in a church or ireland chapel. the mother-in-law told me to wrap up warm as portestant churches were very cold.

 

[RSJ]

Dad: What? Is your brother not having any christmas dinner.
Me: No, he's making his own. Dad, he's vegetarian like.
Dad: Ah but sure wouldn't he have a bit of turkey or something, it's christmas.

 

[andyman]

Dad: What? Is your brother not having any christmas dinner.
Me: No, he's making his own. Dad, he's vegetarian like.
Dad: Ah but sure wouldn't he have a bit of turkey or something, it's christmas.

Fuck, that's some Ireland right there.

 

[washingcattle]

From Joe via text: "Re 1931: My mother thought 'lol' meant lots of love and put it at the end of a text offering her condolences at the death of a relative."

got this from BBC live text.

 

[RSJ]

Fuck, that's some Ireland right there.

The father got very upset when the brother quit the meat, despite the fact he was only doing it cos meat had started giving him terrile stomach ulcers. I had to double my bacon intake to keep the old man happy.

 

[Andy_aurel]

Cool thread.

Watched the film Memento with my Dad. Afterwards someone came in and asked him what the film was about.

Dad: "It's about a man who can't mind who he is and travels back in time."

 

[Jill Hives]

Talking to my dad on the phone:

Dad: It's been awfully cold here. We've had the heating on.
Me: What? You're in Florida!
Dad: It's been getting down to the mid 50's (mind you this is about 13 degrees here) at night.
Me: Oh don't complain to me about weather... I'm still sleeping with two hot water bottles.
Dad: You know how you could fix that .... you could get married so then you'd have a man to keep you warm.
Me: Yeah, thanks dad.

 

[classic seanc]

Talking about a town in the Alps:

Dad: Sure, twas the Romans that built the town. They built the road there..to...to...to...
Mum: To where they were going
Dad: Aye

 

[jonah]

I was chatting to my Dad on Skype last night, and he started telling me about how my younger brother was flying to Taiwan on Tuesday, it went a bit like this

Ciara : I know, sure I saw that on facebook
Dad : ...
Dad : HOW DID FACEBOOK KNOW?

 

[Jill Hives]

The last thing I need is my Father to try facebook.

Dad: How have you been?
Me: Oh grand, no real news though.
Dad: (huge sigh) I thought you'd be married by now.
Me: What, since the last time we talked?*
Dad: Okay, here's your mother.













* ...and they wonder why I don't call home much.

 

[washingcattle]

The last thing I need is my Father to try facebook.

Dad: How have you been?
Me: Oh grand, no real news though.
Dad: (huge sigh) I thought you'd be married by now.
Me: What, since the last time we talked?*
Dad: Okay, here's your mother.













* ...and they wonder why I don't call home much.

Jesus your parents sound like they were written by Jane Austin.

 

[jonah]

My dad decided when I was about 12 that he didn't think I should get married, and that instead of paying for my wedding he'd give me money for a house... I hope he remembers this ludicrous promise.

 

[washingcattle]

My Ma suggested a car for my 18th. My Da and I laughed our bollox off.