I AM IN A BAKE AND REALLY NEDD TO BREAK SOMEONES JAW! (1 Viewer)

[Mormon Nailer]

FUUUUCK


Was on my way to London this morning
Got up at 5
Taxi to the airport.
Had my toileteries in a little washbag with a mesh pouch where I keep all the little mini shampoos etc.
The same washbag I have brough through security in London and US many times
Girl pulls my bag from the x-ray to search
I go over to the table and she starts pulling everything out of the bag.

Finnally she gets to the bag

Her: these have to go
Me: What they are all under the 100ML limit?
Her: They should be in a clear bag
Me: There are in a clear bag
Her No. it has to be a clear plastic bag
Me: that is a clear bag
Her: I'll have to get my supervisor
Me: Get Him

She goes to take the whole washbag with her

Me: Leave that there
Her: What
Me: You are not taking that, go get your supervisor
Her: Please remain here

She goes off looking for the supervisor. in the meantime I take the little bollte of perfume and whatever I can rescue and stash them in my pockets.

2 seconds later the supervisor tears over, obvoiusly already in a temper. He looks at the stuff through the mesh bag.

Him: All these have to go
Me: that are all under 100ML
Him they have to be in a clear plastic bag
Me: They are in a clear bag arent you looking at them now
Him: Did you put them on the belt seperately
Me: No
Him: (very aggrivated at this stage & me not far behind) they have to go

He snatches the stuff out of the bag an storms off.

Me: Bollox

He charges back, grabs my boot - I was in the process of putting the other one on

Him: Your'e not getting on any flight, give me your boarding card
Me: NO
Him: I'm an Authorised officer, give me your boarding card, I'm arresting you.
ME WHAT?

He brings me back out past the x-ray and take my boarding card

Me: Give me my shoe back, I'm putting on my shoe before I go anywhere

He stops just before the place where the first security guard check your boarding card. And leaves my bag up on a bin, he tells the guard there not to let me back in. The whole time he still has my couple of little toiletery bottles in his hand.

Me: Give me back my stuff
Him: Its gone
Me: IF I'M NOT GETTING ON THE FLIGHT THEN GIVE ME BACK MY STUFF

He walks off

ME: FUCKING MARTINET.

 

[drkdrk]

Fucking paranoid morons!

 

[Thebeard]

What pricks! I presume you weren't actually arrested?

 

[jane]

OMG. Fucking hell.

What airport was it?


A fucking WASHBAG?

WASHBAG?

Did you catch your flight in the end?

Fucking hell. Talk about no sense of perspective on these people.

Yeah, those mini-shampoos could be LETHAL WEAPONS. I mean, you could really dry out someone's scalp with that shit.

Like, fine, maybe you're meant to put them on the belt separately, but they didn't have to be such powermania dicks about it. Would it not have been smarter of them to take out the bag and go, "You're meant to put this on separately. Please come through again."? Or something that is a more reasonable version of the stupid, inexplicably senseless no-liquids rule?

Nailer, if I see anyone who wants a broken jaw, I'll send them your way. I'd have been in tears, which also wouldn't have helped.

 

[7 - No tomorrow]

That sucks sweaty balls.

You have to play nice with these power-tripping douchebags though. It's totally their ball.
They can't be bargained with, can't be reasoned with.
'Yes' and 'no' answers - with a silent 'cunt' at the end of each one, if need be.

I think I have the same washbag. Zip on the mesh part?

Sorry for your troubles.

 

[Raudi Raus Schinkel]

Maybe they were all hyper after this

Man held over Heathrow security breach
Friday, 14 March 2008 07:27

Police in London are questioning a man who caused a major security alert when he got onto a runway at Heathrow airport yesterday afternoon.

The intruder is thought to have scaled a perimeter fence next to the northern runway.

He ran towards a plane but was quickly tackled by armed police.


The incident caused flight delays and some cancellations.

The latest security breach, the 2nd in recent weeks, came ahead of today's opening of the new £4.2bn Terminal 5 building at Heathrow by Britain's Queen Elizabeth.

 

[pete]

I love this shit. Apart from the complete insanity of the rule in the first place, absolutley no consideration is given to WHY the rule says "clear plastic bag" (hint: it's not because of clear plastic's bomb-proof qualities), only that it specifies "clear plastic bag" so THAT'S THE RULE. END. OF.

Letter of complaint time.

Although you should have had them out on the belt.

 

[Mormon Nailer]

It was Shannon.

the thing is ive brought that same bag through umpteen times. I've also used it in France and in the US.

And if a TSA officer in the US behaved like he behaved they'd loose thier job no questions.

No only that but to keep the toiletries even though I wasn't on the flight.

Pure Fucking Vindictiveness.

 

[pete]

Would never happen in a proper airport (dublin).

 

[Mormon Nailer]

Would never happen in a proper airport (dublin).

I may get to test that hypothesis later today

 

[pete]

Don't forget your (transparent) bag.

 

[7 - No tomorrow]

I wonder how many lists you're on now since this morning, Nailer.

 

[jane]

It was Shannon.

the thing is ive brought that same bag through umpteen times. I've also used it in France and in the US.

And if a TSA officer in the US behaved like he behaved they'd loose thier job no questions.

No only that but to keep the toiletries even though I wasn't on the flight.

Pure Fucking Vindictiveness.

I think it would be easier if they were just consistent. Like, one day you're allowed to bring a bottle with a flaming rag in it, no problem, and the next day they want to remove 90% of your blood because your veins are over the 100ml limit.

The anxiety of their inconsistency makes me feel less safe. That, and the fact that being weirdly obsessive about the size of a shampoo bottle just detracts attention from stuff that matters, like making sure your engines are all functioning.

 

[SONYMEGADRIVE]

if god meant for you to fly richard, he would have given you a beak

 

[Froog]

makes me wanna bomb airports.

 

[billygannon]

Maybe you should have shaved the beard and not worn the long white gown and turban?

 

[pete]

Here - perfume? The terrorists have already won.

Get off my plane.

 

[Mormon Nailer]

Although you should have had them out on the belt.

True but normally if they hand search the bag they look at the shampoos and if they are within the limits they give them back. To keep them not for security, but just to penalise you for forgetting to take them out of the bag is dead wrong.

If you forgot to take your laptop out do they think they could confiscate that.

 

[Mormon Nailer]

I wonder how many lists you're on now since this morning, Nailer.

the whole thing was so absurd I was half thinking of calling his bluff an saying "go on arrest me" but at the back of my mind was the thought of explaining to my boss how I was on a no fly list

 

[Mormon Nailer]

Here - perfume? The terrorists have already won.

Get off my plane.

Sorry

Aftershave

Old Spice it was.