(Emotional) Maturity? (1 Viewer)

[brianoak]

i used to have a g/f who's ma was 15 when she had her. we got on like a house on fire. and hot as fuck to boot.


....excuse me for a minute.

Deadly,did she ever get drunk and come home and start making moves on you and shit??
This thread has taken an upswing.

 

[Bellatrix]

and i don't think a ma that would leave her kid in a changing room (without realising and freaking out) is gonna cop on that much as she gets older..

"Leaving your kid in the changing room in Marks & Spencer" is a kind of catch-all term for all the different ways I imagine I could screw up my offspring: behaviourally, nutritionally etc.

I could still fuck them up in all of those ways in five years time, but at least I wouldn't be doing so in a college dorm. Gnome sane?

 

[Hector Grey]

"Leaving your kid in the changing room in Marks & Spencer" is a kind of catch-all term for all the different ways I imagine I could screw up my offspring: behaviourally, nutritionally etc.

I could still fuck them up in all of those ways in five years time, but at least I wouldn't be doing so in a college dorm. Gnome sane?

you never know, maybe having a baby could be just the catalyst someone needs for a bit of emotional maturity. do you really think you'd be stupid enough to leave your kid in the microwave or something? i men, it would be your kid, right? you might not want any harm to come to it...

 

[Lord Damian]

Deadly,did she ever get drunk and come home and start making moves on you and shit??
This thread has taken an upswing.

if by "did she ever get drunk and come home and start making moves on you and shit" you mean "did you ever lock yourself in their upstairs bathroom with a picture from her modelling days, a stiff cocktail and a gentle breeze blowing through the window while you wanked yourself into a slobbering, red-faced mess", then yeah. who wouldn't?

 

[Bellatrix]

i men, it would be your kid, right? you might not want any harm to come to it...

I don't know, man. What if that thing was cramping my style?

 

[Hector Grey]

I don't know, man. What if that thing was cramping my style?

get with the times, dude. babies are the new black. black babies expecially.

then off to the social welfare with you.

 

[Corey]

i love the idea of having kids..my little sis is having a baby and it's the coolest thing in the world..imagine a little madser clone to bring around with you!

How serious are you about this? I can help you out.

Not like that.

 

[Corey]

It is the most life affirming piece of shit i've ever taken on.

Hectors right about the kids thing, i in no way had my shit together before Charly was born; and although my shit's not presently pushed together to form a large and fantastic 'shit-sculpture' about life and love; my shit is now relatively closer to itself than it used to be.

Hector will father many children.

 

[Hector Grey]

It is the most life affirming piece of shit i've ever taken on.

Hectors right about the kids thing, i in no way had my shit together before Charly was born; and although my shit's not presently pushed together to form a large and fantastic 'shit-sculpture' about life and love; my shit is now relatively closer to itself than it used to be.

Hector will father many children.

you betchya, buddy.

 

[brianoak]

if by "did she ever get drunk and come home and start making moves on you and shit" you mean "did you ever lock yourself in their upstairs bathroom with a picture from her modelling days, a stiff cocktail and a gentle breeze blowing through the window while you wanked yourself into a slobbering, red-faced mess", then yeah. who wouldn't?

Im not judging you man.You should have tried it on though.

 

[Buzzo]

check out the 'nearly married' on this thread! Deadly Buzz!

children are amazing. I checked my messages today on my phone while I was in work and there was one from my two year old neice, who is the most fabulous human I've met in years and has just mastered the art of conversation exchange, saying 'nigh nigh eefa'. My heart nearly broke.
I might steal her.

 

[jane]

I don't associate getting hitched and/or having babies with the end of anything, just a new way of being, and if you're with the right person, you work as a team and stuff. Unfortunately, at the same time as grappling with the idea of moving my career and my life toward a point where I could support a child financially and emotionally, I also have to grapple with the very real concept that I may never have them because I might not make it before I run out of breeding years.

You don't have to accept something you don't think is right for you, and there are ways to pull your life together in a way that suits your enjoyment of living and allows you to be your best self, and still allows you to do the family/house/job thing. I can say this, of course, being 31, single, and still woefully underemployed, and I may find my hopes totally shattered by the time I'm 35, but fuck it.

Unfortunately, I'm not marriage material, or so I'm often told. So fuck it, I assume that if I just move my life toward a place where I can do it myself, and I end up having to be intimate with a turkey baster when I'm in my late 30s, then so be it. Wouldn't be easy, but it can't be harder than being stuck in a miserable situation that might look 'stable' from the outside but be anything but nurturing or stable on the inside. I'd rather have a home that was totally stable and loving, even if not 'traditional', than one that's unhappy but 'proper'.

I don't even really see any of it as 'settling down'. You're never either settled down as a person or you're not -- it's an ongoing process. I know who I am and what I want, and the kind of people I want in my life, and even though I'm in extreme debt, overeducated, underemployed and never know where my next bit of dosh is coming from, at least I can say if I fall on my face, it was in pursuit of something I actually wanted, and not over crippling mortgage payments on a house I never liked anyway. A lot of people still seem to hang on to this 'either/or' thing, where you're either settled or you're not, and that it's about the external qualities and not your own inner ones. But the people I know who've done it their own way are not only the happiest, they have the happiest families, and the happiest kids.

 

[Lord Damian]

Im not judging you man.You should have tried it on though.

yeah, that wouldn't have been weird at all.

I don't associate getting hitched and/or having babies with the end of anything, just a new way of being, and if you're with the right person, you work as a team and stuff. Unfortunately, at the same time as grappling with the idea of moving my career and my life toward a point where I could support a child financially and emotionally, I also have to grapple with the very real concept that I may never have them because I might not make it before I run out of breeding years.

You don't have to accept something you don't think is right for you, and there are ways to pull your life together in a way that suits your enjoyment of living and allows you to be your best self, and still allows you to do the family/house/job thing. I can say this, of course, being 31, single, and still woefully underemployed, and I may find my hopes totally shattered by the time I'm 35, but fuck it.

Unfortunately, I'm not marriage material, or so I'm often told. So fuck it, I assume that if I just move my life toward a place where I can do it myself, and I end up having to be intimate with a turkey baster when I'm in my late 30s, then so be it. Wouldn't be easy, but it can't be harder than being stuck in a miserable situation that might look 'stable' from the outside but be anything but nurturing or stable on the inside. I'd rather have a home that was totally stable and loving, even if not 'traditional', than one that's unhappy but 'proper'.

I don't even really see any of it as 'settling down'. You're never either settled down as a person or you're not -- it's an ongoing process. I know who I am and what I want, and the kind of people I want in my life, and even though I'm in extreme debt, overeducated, underemployed and never know where my next bit of dosh is coming from, at least I can say if I fall on my face, it was in pursuit of something I actually wanted, and not over crippling mortgage payments on a house I never liked anyway. A lot of people still seem to hang on to this 'either/or' thing, where you're either settled or you're not, and that it's about the external qualities and not your own inner ones. But the people I know who've done it their own way are not only the happiest, they have the happiest families, and the happiest kids.

oh look, Jane wrote an essay. odd.

 

[Mormon Nailer]

You're never either settled down as a person or you're not -- it's an ongoing process.

??

 

[jane]

??

Fine, it's an awkward sentence, but I think it's pretty clear that I meant that 'settling down' is an ongoing process, and has more to do with who you are than where you are according to what's 'proper'.

You got anything better to do on a Friday night apart from nitpick about my posts?

 

[Mormon Nailer]

Its only Frday lunchtime for me and I'm at work. So it's not like I stayed in to nitpick or anything.

 

[snakybus]

So anyway - what would you do with all this freedom in the event of no kids, no committment?

What do you do now? Live in caravans and play the mandolin with a rose between your teeth? Walk the earth like what's-his-name in Kung Fu?

No - I would hazard that you think about what wine is the best, whether you would like new shelves just there in the corner, and discuss Jamie Oliver's latest recipe book while you play the latest Katie Mehlua record ever-so-softly in the background at dinner parties. Exciting, isn't it? It's oh so rock-and-roll.

And just think - in ten years time, after failing to commit to all that boring stuff, you'll still be doing all that still - except now you'll be 45! With a limp prick and a hernea! Exciting, isn't it? And as you sit there making your mealy-mouthed conversation with your "partner" of two months (in the parlance of the times), you'll wonder what the point of all of this is. And how nobody appreciates Katie Mehlua anymore. Pass the gravy, dear. Isn't this nice?

 

[ICUH8N]

What the hell are you talking about?

 

[Corey]

What the hell are you talking about?

Haha! -No surprises there.


arf.

 

[Corey]

I don't associate getting hitched and/or having babies with the end of anything, just a new way of being, and if you're with the right person, you work as a team and stuff. Unfortunately, at the same time as grappling with the idea of moving my career and my life toward a point where I could support a child financially and emotionally, I also have to grapple with the very real concept that I may never have them because I might not make it before I run out of breeding years.

You don't have to accept something you don't think is right for you, and there are ways to pull your life together in a way that suits your enjoyment of living and allows you to be your best self, and still allows you to do the family/house/job thing. I can say this, of course, being 31, single, and still woefully underemployed, and I may find my hopes totally shattered by the time I'm 35, but fuck it.

Unfortunately, I'm not marriage material, or so I'm often told. So fuck it, I assume that if I just move my life toward a place where I can do it myself, and I end up having to be intimate with a turkey baster when I'm in my late 30s, then so be it. Wouldn't be easy, but it can't be harder than being stuck in a miserable situation that might look 'stable' from the outside but be anything but nurturing or stable on the inside. I'd rather have a home that was totally stable and loving, even if not 'traditional', than one that's unhappy but 'proper'.

I don't even really see any of it as 'settling down'. You're never either settled down as a person or you're not -- it's an ongoing process. I know who I am and what I want, and the kind of people I want in my life, and even though I'm in extreme debt, overeducated, underemployed and never know where my next bit of dosh is coming from, at least I can say if I fall on my face, it was in pursuit of something I actually wanted, and not over crippling mortgage payments on a house I never liked anyway. A lot of people still seem to hang on to this 'either/or' thing, where you're either settled or you're not, and that it's about the external qualities and not your own inner ones. But the people I know who've done it their own way are not only the happiest, they have the happiest families, and the happiest kids.

Marry me, I think.