Bored In Work Altern-8 (1 Viewer)

[pete]

Bank Holiday Monday's are always so,so quiet....

 

[herv]

AH I WANNA GO FUCKING HOME!!!!!!

its not a bank holiday in austria you know.

theres no food in the canteen. i had to steal 2 muffins.

cunthooks.

i hate this place.

arrgh. arrrrrg. arr. arrrrrgh. niggifff.

its not even worth the double pay.

or the day in lieu.

 

[Lolo]

I was wondering why it was so bleedin' quiet in here. Bah!

 

[Monkey]

"its not a bank holiday in austria you know....

its not even worth the double pay.

or the day in lieu."

I didn't get double pay or a day in lieu. I had to get up at 4 in the morning and cycle for a half hour to get to work. I can only access websites that I have to use for work and I had to try to ring people in Greece who don't speak the same language as me or even use the same alphabet.

So stop your whinging!

 

[herv]

all is now in perspective.

 

[Ed]

grim, the waether's gonna be nice again today, i'm not liking being inside

 

[mark]

is it just me or is EVERYONE in foul humour today? bus drivers, housemates, computers! bank holidays are grand and all but 1 sunday per week is enough for me. and will everybody please shut up about '6 feet under', i'm sure its great but i havent seen it.

 

[Ed]

"As I bit into the nectarine, it had a crisp juiciness about it that was very pleasurable - until I realized it wasn't a nectarine at all, but A HUMAN HEAD!!"

Where's that from? i know i've read it before, and it'll bug me all day

 

[mark]

'deep thoughts' by jack handy.
do a search on it. it's very funny.

 

[Ed]

ta vurry munch

 

[Hector Grey]

today i will be mostly drunk in work. it makes everything pass so quickly....

 

[krystal]

Originally posted by Hector Grey
today i will be mostly drunk in work. it makes everything pass so quickly....

today I will be mostly run off my fingers
which is poxy

 

[billygannon]

Well... my work r-8 is down, so I need to concentr-8 so that I can elev-8 it back up.... work is not gr-8, but it pays the r-8s which stop my landlord from ber-8ing me about paying the rent l-8

 

[krystal]

well done billygammon - I think you've just kilt this thread stoney dead.

 

[Ed]

It looks like wearing shorts and a t-shirt today could turn out to have been the wrong decision.

 

[dudley]

i'm not sad if there ain't no sun today

myself and the wan went down to blessington on sunday, to see where i grew up
when we left dublin weather was horrendous and wet, second we got off the bus it was gorgeous, and we had brought rain gear.

first mishap was a bee flying inside my t-shirt and me jumping around beating my back as he stung me repeatedly

second mishap was falling into a ditch and banjaxing me knee

thirdly, i got very very badly sunburnt on my arms and neck


fucking sun

 

[Ed]

i'm not normally into the sun, but i'm dressed for it today, serves me right i suppose, i have realised that my runners don't go with my red t-shirt and beige shorts, which is an important thing to learn.

 

[old]

My workmates reckon if it stung you more'n once, it had to be a wasp.

I thank you.

 

[Ed]

Originally posted by old
My workmates reckon if it stung you more'n once, it had to be a wasp.

I thank you.

That's quite possibly right, bees lose their stinger after one sting, which is kinda sad, except when one of the fuckers stings you behind the ear and manages to lay you up for 2 days.

 

[snakybus]

I can top that.

Since yer all bored, here's a story about a thick bollix. Let's call him "Mike" to protect his identity.

"Mike" decides he'll try his hand at cooking a meal on a bank holiday Monday. He goes to the shops and buys a few bits and pieces like red hot chili peppers, onions etc etc.

First up, he opens up the chilis and takes out the seeds bare handed.

Next he chops a few onions. He goes "Ouch, these onions are stinging my eyes."

He vigorously rubs them with his chili-oil-soaked hands. As I said, "Mike's" IQ is drifting towards negative figures. He's not very smart, like.

Screaming ensues, to be heard from South Circular Road to South Africa. Screaming and running around the house blind. And clocking heads into doors. And bashing legs off corners of tables. And running of nose. And searching for cold tap. And coughing and spitting. And burning, burning agony.

Ten minutes later, the agony stops. The most painful experience of his stupid life. But the face continues to burn.

"Mike" ends up on the bed, asking his girlfriend to cook the dinner. She's too busy laughing. Laughing, I tell you!

What do you got to do to get your quare wan to cook for you!