the dumb things you do (2 Viewers)

[Lord Damian]

post up recent examples of lapsed common sense here.

i just tried to cool off a big spoonful of chili that had freshly crumbled crackers on top of it...by blowing on it....crumbs everywhere.

also, grabbed a pizza out of the oven last night with bare hands. not really advisable.

 

[Diddles]

Back in the days when leeks had just been invented in Ireland, I tried to slice one by whittling it with a very sharp knife, resulting in several stitches to my finger.

I am constantly picking up ridiculously hot things with my hands. I'm very clumsy with power tools as well and have had several near misses.

My brother recently tried to angrily cut rawl plugs with a scissors and stabbed himself in the hand. He had to have an operation!

 

[ernesto]

i punch myself in the head more often than i should, like trying to force something and resulting in me lookin embarrased and confused. only a while ago did i try to do a scissors kick in a game of footie and i kicked the ball straight into my own face. great embarrasing fun

 

[krystal]

I'm a bit distracted at the moment and today put a chicken in the oven without taking off the elasticy bit holding its legs together.

the other day I walked off from the check in desk in heathrow without taking mine and stans passports (strictly speaking not my fault REALLY as the bad tempered bitch checking us in didn't give them back)

2 days before that walked away from the origins counter in dublin airport after dropping 78 quid on moisturiser WITHOUT THE BAG

have walked off from 2 ATMs recently without collecting my cash

plus probably a few more incidents of stupidity. I really must stop waking around with my head in the clouds.

edit - I'm about to have a bath, I sure do hope I don't drown

 

[egg_]

I've a few scars on my hands from being overconfident with knives. Last time I cut myself (trying to cut the metal collar off an olive oil bottle before recycling it) Mrs. egg_ was away and egg_ jr. was in the sitting room, and as I squeezed my finger to try and stop the blood all I could think of was "hope I don't faint cos there's no one to look after the child"

Never did faint from cutting myself though, dunno why I thought that thought. Uh oh, I'm rambling again amn't I?

 

[Vinnie]

I once forgot to put a cigarette in my mouth and lit my lips. It was with a match so it was that little bit worse than a lighter.

Recently, I was in France and could not work out what time a football match was kicking off despite knowing what time it was kicking off.

 

[Corey]

I broke my balls.

 

[flashback]

I got stabbed on the way to Metalwork class, and thought I would be grand, and carried on with the class, until my mate asked why my shirt was torn, and there was blood all over the shop.
Then I was persuaded to leave.

Another time, I cut a substantial chunk out of my left index finger with a tin snips in metalwork, during an exam. I carried on, washed the blood off the yoke I made, and ignored the bleeding for the next week or so.
I broke my ankle... got crutches off my mate, and ignored it, until the whole thing seized up and then I went to the local physio.

I bought a motorbike. A number of times.

 

[Corey]

My mate cooked hotdogs in fairy liquid, thinking it was oil. Then ate them. Then got sick.

 

[nlgbbbblth]

Instead of moving the ironing board so that I could plug out the iron, I leaned on top of it and reached over.

The board cracked.

 

[roxy]

Pressed for time this morning going to work...ran out the door, snow and ice alll over car, no de-icer spray left in can, so I grab a saucepan of hot water, slosh it over the windscreen to melt ice and forgot to put the windscreen wipers going. Left the saucepan back in the house and returned seconds later to find a new layer of freshly frozen ice on the windscreen. Turn on my heel and back to house again for more hot water...


I did the walking-away-from-ATM-without-money thing a while back. And I'd been having the worst day up til then too so I actually cried...for about 5 seconds....

 

[flashback]

A couple of the lads and I decided that we were going to try and melt an aluminium bar in the forge which we just figured out how to use.

we fired it up, stick in the chunk, and left it there for about 20 minutes, but it didnt melt. So, we tool it out, and left it somewhere and fucked off.

the teacher then came over, wondered why there was a lump of aluminium left lieing about and grabbed it. Apparently there was smoke and it smelt like rashers. He later got a tongs and dropped it into a big yoke of water... and it boiled the entire trough... instantly.


Another time we stood trying to make the oxy acetelyne torch flashback. This is when the flame jumps back into the nozzle and tries to get into the tanks. Due to a special valve it couldnt actually do this, but it made a fun snapping noise.

This is what we were after. So, we were there, patientaly trying, until teacher walked in. Holding the flashback valve. Then we realised that it wasnt on the torch we were playing with. If it had done a flashback... it would have killed a number of people. Quite a large number I think.

I could basically go on. I am pretty amazed no one died in metal work.

 

[krystal]

I have had several metal working related accidents too - picked up a soldering iron by the wrong end. Twice. I had no fingerprints for months.

I still have a small piece of silver embedded in one of my fingers from maaaahhny mahhny years ago.

 

[Denny Oubidoux]

i have a paper cut on the tip of my left index finger, a sizeable chunk of a pool cue embedded in the middle finger of my left hand since 1994, im always forgetting ive put stuff in the oven and letting it burn... um, i'm pretty together really. the stupidest things i've ever done all happened years ago and they shall remain secret, i hope, for ever.

 

[Unicron]

I did the walking away from the ATM thing a few months back.

 

[ernesto]

went camping. arse of pants got quite wet from sitting on stuff. i wanted dry pants to put on so i decided to blow-torch them dry with some deoderant and a lighter whilst sitting up in the tent at the door so it wouldn't get 'too hot'. i was lucky i only burnt a hole in the door flynetting. i still get slagged about it.
Hermie loves to tear mountains of piss from me for it. he went apeshit at the time coz he robbed the tent from his bro's mate. good times

 

[HMD]

I stood at a bus stop on kildare st this morning in the pissing rain for about 20 min waiting on the 15 bus when i could have got the 14 and about 3 of them went past. So i'm soaked to the bone for my stupidity.

 

[clonan attack]

i mentioned this before but i recently put my jacket in the dishwasher

 

[HMD]

i mentioned this before but i recently put my jacket in the dishwasher

did you turn it on?

 

[Squiggle]

went camping. arse of pants got quite wet from sitting on stuff. i wanted dry pants to put on so i decided to blow-torch them dry with some deoderant and a lighter whilst sitting up in the tent at the door so it wouldn't get 'too hot'. i was lucky i only burnt a hole in the door flynetting. i still get slagged about it.
Hermie loves to tear mountains of piss from me for it. he went apeshit at the time coz he robbed the tent from his bro's mate. good times

Yeah, Hermie told Nate and me that story after you left The Lower Deck a few weeks ago Great story though.

Dumbest thing I've done recently was try to force the plunger down in one of those coffee pots and cover my right arm in scalding hot coffee. That was a couple of months ago and I still have a bit of a scar.