Whats the funniest quote you've ever heard ever? (1 Viewer)

[Corey]

Popped into my head this morning for no reason at all and startled the girlfriend with my sudden giggling crescendo. Cresendo. Crecendo. Crecsendo. Fuck it.

"Battered Women; just because it sounds delicious don't make it right".

Genius.

So, the quote you personally find the most hilarious; one who's sheer comedic genius both defines and determines your place in the world as we see it.









Begin.

 

[Corey]

Wrecked after that. Side splitting stuff. Fuckers.

 

[Stan Bowles]

'Olives? I don't like olives. There's gonna have to be some ch-ch-changes.'

David Bowie walking around Mick and Keef's corner shop before he takes temporary charge while they go on holiday from Stella Street.

 

[krystal]

crescendo

 

[Corey]

crescendo

Classic.

 

[Wheels]

'Here no man, I'm not goin', there's too many gee here.'

 

[broken arm]

'Here no man, I'm not goin', there's too many gee here.'

"I'd like to order one chip please..............yes, one chip"

 

[Wheels]

"I'd like to order one chip please..............yes, one chip"

'I'm sorry, I don't speak English.'

 

[broken arm]

'I'm sorry, I don't speak English.'

tochéééé

ha

 

[northen_sky]

"I don´t think, however exit"

 

[puppetmonkey]

"what d'you mean, i don't love you? Sure don't i buy you chips and ride you".

 

[The Schnapper]

The woman had a fanny like a wizards sleeve

 

[The Schnapper]

"what d'you mean, i don't love you? Sure don't i buy you chips and ride you".

Thats a deadly one I often quote!!

What dye mean I dont luv ye sure dont I buy ye chips n'roide ye n'all

 

[puppetmonkey]

yeah, its a pretty good one. Unfortunately, my overwhelming need for correct grammer at all times prohibits me from spelling it phonetically. thank you for finishing what i started.

 

[Johnnyc]

Some of my faves are;

[SIZE=-1]"In a mad world, only the mad are sane." Akira Kurosawa

"It's so [/SIZE][SIZE=-1] It's so easy to laugh, [/SIZE][SIZE=-1]It's so easy to hate, [/SIZE][SIZE=-1]It takes strength to be gentle and kind." Morrissey

"Stick it up your bollocks..!" Roy Keane
[/SIZE]

 

[Yurn!]

'My wife is lying in the driveway with an ass in her cock '.

 

[Thebeard]

"I--the royal we, you know, the
editorial--I dropped off the money,
exactly as per--Look, I've got certain
information, certain things have
come to light, and uh, has it ever
occurred to you, man, that given the
nature of all this new shit, that,
uh, instead of running around blaming
me, that this whole thing might just
be, not, you know, not just such a
simple, but uh--you know?"

God i love that guy!

 

[Charlie Bucket]

My partner's got a really good idea for making dolls. His name's Presuming Ed. His sister give him the idea. She got a doll on Christmas what pisses itself. Then you've got to change its drawers for it. Horrible really, but they're like that, the little girls. So we're going to make one that shits itself, too.

 

[Dktr. Faustus]

Bill Clinton does not inhale marijuana, right? You bet. Like I chew on LSD but I don't swallow it.

 

[Mormon Nailer]

"I--the royal we, you know, the
editorial--I dropped off the money,
exactly as per--Look, I've got certain
information, certain things have
come to light, and uh, has it ever
occurred to you, man, that given the
nature of all this new shit, that,
uh, instead of running around blaming
me, that this whole thing might just
be, not, you know, not just such a
simple, but uh--you know?"

God i love that guy!

I bet you think you raised hell!