musicky jokes (1 Viewer)

[Scientician 0.8]

What do you call a Dublin singer/songwriter who breaks up with his girlfriend?















Homeless!

How do you get a Dublin singer/songwriter off your doorstep?















Pay for the pizza!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you make a million euro playing music in Dublin?
















Start with two million!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111





I'm here all week guyze.

 

[Kid Lovebeach]

josh pearson told a great one at the ballroom a few years ago,

what's the last thing a hooker does to her asshole before going to work?


























drops him off at band practise!!!!

 

[plug]

Q: what do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
A: a flat minor

 

[Professor O'Rye]

How many members of Boyzone does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one... Ronan. The rest form a circle of stools and quietly cheer him on.

 

[plug]

Q: why are the red hot chilli peppers' veins so brittle?
A: because they've had so many 'hits'!

I ripped that one off neil hamburger

 

[Froog]

If Sonny Bono skis into a tree and no one is around to hear it...Does he make a sound?

 

[kavanelli]

I was walking down the street there was a Homeless man singing, "Dreamer, Nothing but a Dreamer".

I said to him "Ah Supertramp"

"Thanks" He replied

 

[JohnnyRaz]

whats the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

you only have to beat the rythym into a drum machine once!

woka woka!

 

[Unclealo]

More Josh T Pearson:

What's the difference between a large pizza and a musician?




A Large Pizza can feed a family of 4.

 

[egg_]

I'm quite sure I've posted this before, but here it goes again:

A missionary arrives in Darkest Africa, and as he's being brought to his house he asks his guide about the constant drumming he can hear. The guide says "when the drums stop, it's very bad". He hardly sleeps at all that night on account of the racket, the next morning at the breakfast table he again asks about the drums and gets the same response "when the drums stop, it's very bad". As he's going to bed that night they're still at it, so he asks a passer by about the drums again and again gets the response "when the drums stop, it's very bad". He doesn't let it lie this time and says "why? why? what happens when the drums stop?". The passer by answers ...





















... bass solo

 

[egg_]

How do you know there's a drummer at your door?













The knocking speeds up half way through

 

[Froog]

The stages of a musician's life:

1. Who is name?
2. Get me name.
3. Get me someone who sounds like name.
4. Get me a young name.
5. Who is name?

 

[Froog]

How do put some soul into a duck? Put it in the oven until its Bill Withers.

 

[snakybus]

The stages of a musician's life:

1. Who is name?
2. Get me name.
3. Get me someone who sounds like name.
4. Get me a young name.
5. Who is name?

I don't get this one

 

[Froog]

The stages of a musician's life:

1. Who is snakybus?
2. Get me snakybus.
3. Get me someone who sounds like snakybus.
4. Get me a young snakybus.
5. Who is snakybus?

 

[snakybus]

uh...I'm snakybus

 

[travispickle]

No, I'm snakybus

 

[Froog]

 

[hermie]

Doctor, doctor I can't stop singing the Green Green Grass of Home

"Ah yes, sounds like you've got Tom Jones syndrome"

Tom Jones syndrome! Jesus, is that common?

"Well, it's not unusual"

 

[Moods For Mallards]

What was Marvin Gaye's last hit?

I think it was Sexual Healing.