I'm going to use the Wilhelm Reich "Specific Forms of Masturbation" argument and claim that he was merely showing a "strong inclination towards the opposite sex" except instead of a shirt or pillow it was a bike. How's that for a wanky (pun intended) academic justification for perverse sexual acts? Maybe throw in some freudian references too.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concerning_Specific_Forms_of_Masturbation
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Concerning_Specific_Forms_of_Masturbation