Bored In Work 174 (1 Viewer)

[pete]

http://www.sorrygottago.com/

 

[RED(tape)MENACE]

http://boss.streamos.com/download/capi001/okgo/amillionways/video/amillionways_v750.mov

 

[hanley]

aphex twins face in his music

 

[hanley]

..

 

[broken arm]

driving in paris is a mentalist buzz.

 

[RSJ]

Fairly crude, but a lingual achievement none the less.

This was originally shown on BBC TV, back in the seventies. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a snigger (though god knows how many takes) The irony is that the BBC received not one complaint. Must have
been the speed of delivery was too much for the whining herds. Try getting through it without converting the spoonerisms as you read;

This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters. Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot.
At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered. The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers; they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies.

The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go. Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks

The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity. At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper. The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in.

Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted??" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk.

Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard on. He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.

Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny.
Boom,Boom!

 

[RSJ]

Hey shut off, it's monday

 

[broken arm]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

post holiday blues.

work can fuck off

 

[hanley]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

this monday seems ok.didnt do anything over the weekend though.

but fuck monday anyways

 

[LMD64]

which of you guys is starting a new band? I can only do alt.country screams, myself.

 

[Squack]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

this monday seems ok.didnt do anything over the weekend though.

but fuck monday anyways

this monday's great cause i got a promotion... but still have to work in this shite job til they can replace me!
pants

 

[kevin gallen]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

 

[compuwhore]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

yes, this is a truly boring Mondayn.
not even the internet can keep me entertained, but when you think about it...it really is just a whole load of WAN

 

[snakybus]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

You know, I don't mind Modays at all.

 

[compuwhore]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

what about podays?
nodays?
0h-oh-days?

 

[snakybus]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

Tudays are wose.

 

[Bellatrix]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

I was having a really bad day and then I got this email:

DEAR SIR/MADAM,
I KNOW THAT THIS PROPOSAL LETTER MIGHT BE A PLEASANT SUPRISE TO YOU AS WE DON'T KNOW OUR SELVES BEFORE.I AM MR.HASSAN GUEI,A IVORY COAST BORN 27 YEARS AGO,NOW SEEKING ASYLUM IN DAKAR-SENEGAL UNDER (UNHCR)GOT YOUR CONTACT FROM THE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE AS A CAUSE OF MY SERIOUS SEARCH FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON THAT CAN HANDLE SUCH A CONFIDENTIAL TRANSACTION OF THIS NATURE.MY FATHER (LATE GEN DR.ROBERT GUEI.THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF IVORY COAST,BUT WAS ASSASINATED BY THE REBELS ON (19TH SEPTEMBER(2002)AND PROPERTIES DESTROYED,BUT I WAS NARROWLY ESCAPED WITH A VALUEABLE DOCUMENTS CONTAINING (10 MILLION U.SDOLLARS) WHICH IS NOW SAFELY DEPOSITED IN A HIGH SECURITY AND FINANCE COMPANY HERE IN DAKAR AS A FAMILY TREASURE.
HOWEVER,I SADDLED WITH THE PROBLEM OF SECURING A TRUST WORTHY FOREIGN PERSONALITY TO HELP METRANSFER THIS SUM OF TEN MILLION U.S DOLLARS PENDING MY ARRIVAL TO MEET WITH HIM.FURTHERMORE,I ONLY WANT THIS TO BE DONE THIS WAY BECAUSE YOUR COUNTRY IS POLITICALLY STABLE FOR ANY PROFITABLE INVESTMENT AND WILL ALSO WANT TO ADD HERE THAT IF ACCEPTED BY YOU,YOU WILL SERVE AS THE ORIGINAL BENEFICIARY OF THE MONEY.I FEEL CONFIDENT THEREFORE,TO INTRODUCE THIS OFFER TO YOU. FOR YOUR PARTICIPATION AND ASSISTANCE REGARDING THIS TRANSFER,I HAVE DECIDED TO GIVE YOU 15 PERCENT OF THE TOTAL AMOUNT AND 5 PERCENT MAPPED OUT FOR ANY MISCELLENEOUS EXPENSES THAT MAY OCCURE DURING THE TRANSFER OF THE MONEY TO YOUR LOCATION.THEREFORE,YOU ARE REQUESTED TO FURNISH US BACK IMMEDIATELY YOU RECIEVE THIS REQUEST TO TRANSFER THIS MONEY FROM DAKAR SENEGAL TO YOUR COUNTRY RESIDENT ACCOUNT OR ANY ACCOUNT OF YOUR INTEREST.ON COMMENCEMENT OF THIS TRANSACTION I WANT TO LET YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THE FUTURE OF MYSELF DEPENDS SOLELY ON THIS MONEY.SO PLEASE KEEP THIS BUSINESS TO YOURSELF ONLY.FINALLY NOTE THAT THIS BUSINESS IS 100% RISK FREE ON YOUR PART AS A RESULT THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR ABOUT.A COPY OF CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT BOND RECIEPT OF THE SECURITY COMPANY AND ALL THE VITAL DOCUMENTS THAT COVERED THE DEPOSITED MONEY WILL BE SENT TO YOU FOR YOUR RECORD PURPOSE AS SOON AS I HEAR FROM YOU.I AM EAGERLY EXPECTING YOUR EARNEST RESPONSE.

MR.HASSAN GUEI.


100 risk free???? Why, I simply can't lose!

What a great day...

 

[ICUH8N]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

Mondays can still fuck off.

 

[nofriendo]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

I hear bob geldof hates them!

 

[hanley]

Re: Hey shut off, it's monday

I was having a really bad day and then I got this email:

DEAR SIR/MADAM,
I KNOW THAT THIS PROPOSAL LETTER MIGHT BE A PLEASANT SUPRISE TO YOU AS WE DON'T KNOW OUR SELVES BEFORE.I AM MR.HASSAN GUEI,A IVORY COAST BORN 27 YEARS AGO,NOW SEEKING ASYLUM IN DAKAR-SENEGAL UNDER (UNHCR)GOT YOUR CONTACT FROM THE CHAMBER OF COMMERCE AS A CAUSE OF MY SERIOUS SEARCH FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON THAT CAN HANDLE SUCH A CONFIDENTIAL TRANSACTION OF THIS NATURE.MY FATHER (LATE GEN DR.ROBERT GUEI.THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF IVORY COAST,BUT WAS ASSASINATED BY THE REBELS ON (19TH SEPTEMBER(2002)AND PROPERTIES DESTROYED,BUT I WAS NARROWLY ESCAPED WITH A VALUEABLE DOCUMENTS CONTAINING (10 MILLION U.SDOLLARS) WHICH IS NOW SAFELY DEPOSITED IN A HIGH SECURITY AND FINANCE COMPANY HERE IN DAKAR AS A FAMILY TREASURE.
HOWEVER,I SADDLED WITH THE PROBLEM OF SECURING A TRUST WORTHY FOREIGN PERSONALITY TO HELP METRANSFER THIS SUM OF TEN MILLION U.S DOLLARS PENDING MY ARRIVAL TO MEET WITH HIM.FURTHERMORE,I ONLY WANT THIS TO BE DONE THIS WAY BECAUSE YOUR COUNTRY IS POLITICALLY STABLE FOR ANY PROFITABLE INVESTMENT AND WILL ALSO WANT TO ADD HERE THAT IF ACCEPTED BY YOU,YOU WILL SERVE AS THE ORIGINAL BENEFICIARY OF THE MONEY.I FEEL CONFIDENT THEREFORE,TO INTRODUCE THIS OFFER TO YOU. FOR YOUR PARTICIPATION AND ASSISTANCE REGARDING THIS TRANSFER,I HAVE DECIDED TO GIVE YOU 15 PERCENT OF THE TOTAL AMOUNT AND 5 PERCENT MAPPED OUT FOR ANY MISCELLENEOUS EXPENSES THAT MAY OCCURE DURING THE TRANSFER OF THE MONEY TO YOUR LOCATION.THEREFORE,YOU ARE REQUESTED TO FURNISH US BACK IMMEDIATELY YOU RECIEVE THIS REQUEST TO TRANSFER THIS MONEY FROM DAKAR SENEGAL TO YOUR COUNTRY RESIDENT ACCOUNT OR ANY ACCOUNT OF YOUR INTEREST.ON COMMENCEMENT OF THIS TRANSACTION I WANT TO LET YOU UNDERSTAND THAT THE FUTURE OF MYSELF DEPENDS SOLELY ON THIS MONEY.SO PLEASE KEEP THIS BUSINESS TO YOURSELF ONLY.FINALLY NOTE THAT THIS BUSINESS IS 100% RISK FREE ON YOUR PART AS A RESULT THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR ABOUT.A COPY OF CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT BOND RECIEPT OF THE SECURITY COMPANY AND ALL THE VITAL DOCUMENTS THAT COVERED THE DEPOSITED MONEY WILL BE SENT TO YOU FOR YOUR RECORD PURPOSE AS SOON AS I HEAR FROM YOU.I AM EAGERLY EXPECTING YOUR EARNEST RESPONSE.

MR.HASSAN GUEI.


100 risk free???? Why, I simply can't lose!

What a great day...

If your not gonna take up this offer could ya send it onto me, i could really do with making a bunch of risk free money.thanks