Black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow... (1 Viewer)

...that ad for fucking Hales Freight drives me fucking goddamn mental. Every time I pass the place, I want to rip out one of those big, puzzling metal quayside fixtures out of the concrete and smash the place to bits.

There are other ads that elicit a similar response: basically anything on Newstalk 106 (there's a 'simply accountants' ad, something about a franking machine, and -- god, please, no -- that Bargaintown ad), and anything in which they get people on with bad American accents (this thread was inspired by those 'sponsored by Miller' things on the Sopranos last night).

There are many candidates for worst ad ever, are there not?

Won't you add your own tales of torture here?

the radio ad for the car park near the airport with yer wan with the really annoying aussie accent. goes somthing like 'wow five euro, amaaaazzing' in female victor medlrew on speed stylee. words can't do it justice. of course, if i ever had to park my car near the airport i now know where to go. pity i don't own a car and can't drive.

all ads get on my wick..but the bargain town ones are a pet hate.

Latex lizzie said:

all ads get on my wick..but the bargain town ones are a pet hate.

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Yeah, the fact that I might be forking over some money for a mattress from them doesn't sit well. Can I put a set of ad-related conditions on it?

How about those 'Don't see a great night wasted' ones? Just plain stupid.

..oh I love those.They make me think about drinking less.Really.

..if we are gonna do t.v. aswell I hate the one where people get mangled in cars to songs I used to like but dont anymore.Why not use moby tracks ? everyone hates moby yeah?

whatever shit is at the top of this page right now
fuck ads

andrew

jane said:

How about those 'Don't see a great night wasted' ones? Just plain stupid.

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I love those ones - the "what the fuck?" look on the face of the tosser in the green shirt as he sees himself telling that ancient and not very good joke about the man walking into the bar ("ouch!" yeah, ha ha) is a joy to behold

I still hate the guinness ads. Fuck off you pile of pretentious wankers.

love is a kind of hate

I love the Hugh Forkin Interiors sign on Capel St. It sounds so dirty. Just thinking about it makes me smile.

Harvey Nolans superstores : " Go Harvey go" etc
The Tidy Towns TV ad
The ad we did for our album launch on Phantom

is that not harvey norman? jeeze I hate them too. Grrrrr likes them tho...

"Want to be really funny??
Well text us pricks, and we'll send you a really shit joke to torment every dumb fucker you meet, all for the bargain price of E1.20. Jokes about Kerrymen, dumb blondes, and all your favourite irish celebraties.. . . "

Shesh.

Jane, where do you work that has you passing Hales every day?
I work down the docks kissing sailors for negotiable prices. Are you in the same field?

The Chilli King said:

"Want to be really funny??
Well text us pricks, and we'll send you a really shit joke to torment every dumb fucker you meet, all for the bargain price of E1.20. Jokes about Kerrymen, dumb blondes, and all your favourite irish celebraties.. . . "

Shesh.

Jane, where do you work that has you passing Hales every day?
I work down the docks kissing sailors for negotiable prices. Are you in the same field?

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I don't pass Hales every day, but I live on the south side of Dublin Port, and sometimes I walk into town along the north quays.

'Negotiable prices,' eh? So you're the one who's been stealing my business! I've had to change my shtick completely because of you and your 'flickitty tongue'. I'm learning things about starfish I never, ever wanted to know....

Uh, um....yeah....

Tile Savers: beside the Point.

Speaking of nautical themes, there was an ad for the New England Aquarium that ran for years, throughout the childhoods of all of us in our mid-twenties to mid-thirties. It won't mean anything to anyone here, I guess (except me, so that counts -- right?),but it featured brief vignettes of children getting intense pleasure from their visits. Two of the lines from it are burned into the collective memories of all New Englanders everywhere: 'It's fun to find out what makes an ocean wave wave.' and the sing-songy voice of a bratty twat child batting its arms and singing, 'I can walk like a penguin.' So can I dickhead, so can I.

there is a special place in hell reserved for those responsible for that bloody "carlsberg don't make flatmates.." ad. "ooh!!! football legends!!!", indeed. nyarrrghhh. it also appears to have been running in almost every ad break for the last nine thousand years.

i'm also working on a fairly profound hatred for:
*that idiotic new one where everyone ignores the woman for having flat hair
*all nivea ads
*all l'oreal ads

I hate those Stella Artois ads in the cinema. The first time you see them, they are ok, but then you have to sit through them every time you go.
Also, how did the woman know that the guy bought the waitress the shoes? Really annoys me. And the tagline: Reassuringly Expensive. Really stupid.
Anyway, must lie down now.

jane said:

basically anything on Newstalk 106

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aieeeeeeeee!
the newstalk ads are *gas*

i'm convinced some of them are produced in house
as newstalk are desperate for advertisers
you can actually hear some of their presenters putting on
accents in those ads....i'm nearly sure.

i do love newstalk tho'
well apart from that idiot "chris-barry-sound-a-like" Declan
who comes on after McWilliams
*shudder*

great newstalk ads include:

the cheapest one EVER with the dad telling the son
"there's the rain now, trip to beach is off"
and the kid goes "awwwwww"
it was so badly recorded that it took me at least 7 listens
before I could actually understand what they were saying
PLUS I'm convinced it's the same amateur actor doing both
voices, he emits a pathetic squeaky adult attempt at the kids voice.
hil - a - rious

the bendy banana franking machine ad
yes....

...an ad for franking machines

halles freight ad is particularly annoying

do you remember the surreal northside furniture store ad they ran
for a while with the worst ever tony soprano/northsider accent?
oh jesus


but, yeah, newstalk is cool

minka said:

there is a special place in hell reserved for those responsible for that bloody "carlsberg don't make flatmates.." ad. "ooh!!! football legends!!!", indeed. nyarrrghhh. it also appears to have been running in almost every ad break for the last nine thousand years.

i'm also working on a fairly profound hatred for:
*that idiotic new one where everyone ignores the woman for having flat hair
*all nivea ads
*all l'oreal ads

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YES!

'How about Brazilian?'

'And that is how we beat England in Stuttgart.'

Northside Furniture.....oooooohhhhhhhhhh fuck.

I listen to Newstalk because I am a closet masochist, I think. I do like Karen Coleman, and I have a softspot for the cantankerous old George Hook.

But that fucking 'married, single or gay' thing drives me mental.
'Why do you think he's gay, now?'

'Because he likes to drink wine and he sounds like a gay.'

Way to chip away at the stereotypes! Hooray! Hooray!

the new ad for that air freshner... the one where this bird is opening some modern art exhibition and knocks one of the glass pieces on he floor just before it opens and replaces it with one of these new air freshners.... and then the punters come in and they start saying when they pass it "mmmmmm, this piece smells fantastic...." and then this ABSOLUTE FUCKING CUNT bends down, smells it and giggles... blonde hair, centre parting..... FUCKING BASTARD!!! i hate him. even worse than that guy who says "if you get my drift..." from the kerrygold ad.

Wait, that reminds me, 'Dad, who's taking the horse to France?'

Good god.

ha ha, had forgotten about that... the bird in that ad in mad saucy buh, kinda makes up for takin' the horse to france... actually, i'll do it!!!

Speaking of 'sauce', any and all Dolmio ads.

'I know, I text dem...'