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your too much cake problem is failing to impress anyone

even the guy who shat on the floor and phlegmed on the bar?

tirty tree and a tird

foreigners are always telling me i don't sound irish pricks then again i hate the way irish people speak when i hear myself recorded it just sounds like "ta toy ta toy ta toy"

try zebra-print pants?

ha, i saw that i'm sitting on a goldmine

i like to cover my desk with nice rocks

i thought boxing day was what the brits say

we're a deeply private company

or maybe

i don't get it :(

huh. weird people give far too much of a fuck what randomers think about them.

surprised so many of these people are so cagey about their wage...like who cares? what is it going to reveal about you that's so private? How much do you earn – and why won't you tell us? | Money | The Guardian

i think they're ok only a very occasional spot of yachting

my work situation is these dogs looking at me while i try to work always lookin'

they always look grumpy though

and i thought my brother's job in a chocolate factory was cruisy

"another day at the office lol"

PS As a gesture of good faith, I will take it upon myself to ensure that my machine is already fully off by the stroke of 5 each evening.

Hi Bob, If you need my computer on and ready for me to begin work at 9 on the dot, please ensure that you switch it on before I arrive for my paid working hours. Regards...