Sexism, god help us (1 Viewer)

I find it creepy when I hear of university faculty going out with students in final year or postgrad students - when both parties are clearly at least in their 20s - precisely because of the power imbalance and the opportunity for someone to be able to exert control over a student. It’s that times a million for a teacher-student relationship in school, even if the student is 18 and the teacher is young.

This x 1000. I'm not sure the extent to which this happens anymore but certainly when I was an undergrad/postgrad in the late 80s/early 90s there was a lot of this going on. Ignoring the power relatonships and excusing this sort of thing because everyone is over 18 and consenting adults etc etc is just unbelievably naive. It's very simple. Don't fuck your students.
 
I find it creepy when I hear of university faculty going out with students in final year or postgrad students - when both parties are clearly at least in their 20s - precisely because of the power imbalance and the opportunity for someone to be able to exert control over a student. It’s that times a million for a teacher-student relationship in school, even if the student is 18 and the teacher is young.
Mate of mine went out with her university lecturer while still his undergrad student. 15 years later she still says people are fucking squares for having a problem with it. What am I gonna do? Lecturer her about power imbalance until she agrees?

Another friend went out with one of her tutors for a while, nothing especially bad happened but she utterly regrets it and thinks he's a total sleazeball for doing it while he was in a position of power over her.

🤷‍♂️
 
Mate of mine went out with her university lecturer while still his undergrad student. 15 years later she still says people are fucking squares for having a problem with it. What am I gonna do? Lecturer her about power imbalance until she agrees?

Another friend went out with one of her tutors for a while, nothing especially bad happened but she utterly regrets it and thinks he's a total sleazeball for doing it while he was in a position of power over her.

🤷‍♂️

It's the Lecturers/Tutors that (somewhat ironically) need the lecture. Not your friends.
 
I had a trist with a lecturer when I was in college, I was 17, didn't see an issue with it at the time, despite him being roughly twice my age - looking back on it though, what the actual fuck was he at. Like, do I feel horribly traumatized by it, no, but I do think there was a huge difference between how mature I thought I was vs how mature I actually was. Also just from his perspective like, me thinking it was fucked or not doesn't negate it being a fucked up thing on his part.
 
It's funny, I have been thinking about a couple of things that have come up here and on the Twitter pile-on thread in the last couple of days, and I have given a couple of examples of WEIRD THINGS, and it just makes me feel a bit sad, as I have realised you just end up getting used to dealing with incidents like this as part of life, but when they are tallied up together, it makes for grim reading :mad:.
 
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This tweet irritates me in that I can't actually disagree with it, but it's coming from a place of looking for a reason to condemn, rather than looking for a way to understand
 
Mate of mine went out with her university lecturer while still his undergrad student. 15 years later she still says people are fucking squares for having a problem with it. What am I gonna do? Lecturer her about power imbalance until she agrees?
Take her word for it that it was a positive experience, same as you'd take her word for it if it was a negative experience. That's what we do these days, right?
 

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