Sexism, god help us (2 Viewers)

ann post

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"Someone will end up dead". What? Why? How?

The erosion of trust.

Precursor:
A: I've been sent these pictures by partners (female)
B: I have sent these pictures to partners (none have my lad in them soz, it was mutual fun stuff).

Now these things happened within the trust of the relationship and even though these relationships are long defunct and various things ranging from friendships to never going to darken door again scenarios exist, but the images I deleted years ago and I would never have even showed them to my mates. I'd 100% trust the people who have images of me, regardless of our current standing to not pass them on. If they rub one out once in a while over my cadaver thats fine, i did have sex with them like. That is a trust I have with people i've not seen for 15 years.

Now transpose to a scenario where someone you trusted for maybe 2-3 years of your life, who you had the sexytime etc and you found that all the sexytime pics were shared into a discord for free distribution on discord by a bunch of people you don't know, mid lockdown and you were a person who already had some level of anxiety maybe for whatever reason, and now you know for the rest of your life you can walk into a workplace and no matter what you've achieved theres a chance the lads are going to be standing around the water cooler sniggering some morning and never looking at you the same and the relationships you had were all lies..
 

egg_

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Ok, I totally understand that you would feel betrayed by someone who shared a pic you trusted them with. I don't really understand all the other stuff. But like ... if everyone shares pics with their sexual partners now, so men know sexy pics already exist of all the women they know, then why would they never look at them the same if they actually saw one?

(again, I'm not trying to deny people's suffering - I understand it emotionally, but I'm trying to understand it intellectually too)
 

ann post

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Ok, I totally understand that you would feel betrayed by someone who shared a pic you trusted them with. I don't really understand all the other stuff. But like .
I can't be sure or not by guessing because I don't know the ins and outs of the life of egg, but the expereience of being thrown into a reality where possibly both the trust in the people you live with, and the layer of your personal life you keep far from your workplace are both completly decimated literally overnight leaving you entirely between stools is a significant challenge for the old mental health, especially when you are trapped in a lockdown in the dead of november. I can't really speak to the intellectual, but I can fully understand why that lady is concerned that lives might be lost. I haven't had the same experience but I have had less significant versions of that and that's what i'm relating to here in terms of breach of trust being the real issue here.
 

Squiggle

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Ok, I totally understand that you would feel betrayed by someone who shared a pic you trusted them with. I don't really understand all the other stuff. But like ... if everyone shares pics with their sexual partners now, so men know sexy pics already exist of all the women they know, then why would they never look at them the same if they actually saw one?

(again, I'm not trying to deny people's suffering - I understand it emotionally, but I'm trying to understand it intellectually too)
As Rita said women are judged and held to different standards by society as a whole. It is that simple, and you may never get it if it never impacts you personally. Behaviour in a man that is "strong", "powerful", "leadership" is considered "bitchy", "bossy", "domineering" if it is a woman. Raped women are considered as at some level "asking for it" or being at least partially culpable. Murdered women too. Naked pics on the internet can prevent a woman being taken seriously for the rest of her life, it can ruin her career chances. Men are not similarly harmed, the worst they will face is a bit of slagging.
 

Lili Marlene

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As Rita said women are judged and held to different standards by society as a whole. It is that simple, and you may never get it if it never impacts you personally. Behaviour in a man that is "strong", "powerful", "leadership" is considered "bitchy", "bossy", "domineering" if it is a woman. Raped women are considered as at some level "asking for it" or being at least partially culpable. Murdered women too. Naked pics on the internet can prevent a woman being taken seriously for the rest of her life, it can ruin her career chances. Men are not similarly harmed, the worst they will face is a bit of slagging.
I think what egg is getting at is "assuming all is equal, and everyone does it, and everyone knows, why would it matter?" which would be true if all was equal, of course the answer is all is not equal.
 

chris d

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Haven't seen much about it, a few posts on my twitter from people i don't follow. I feel so far removed from the generation that shares nude photographs and im 38.

Clearly, anyone who shares those without consent is worthless. That seems so obvious that hopefully the victims can take comfort in most people realising this. But the world isnt fair.

Underage pictues is a whole other shit show, and underage lads sharing them is whole other level of moral and legal shit housery im not going to pretend to understand.
 

Squiggle

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Whoa whoa. Yes there are. Are you saying that you think shame is worse than dying? Wow. Ok
It's not a bit of shame though, which is what you aren't getting. For many girls/women it is a life altered, filled with abuse, ostracism - the modern day equivalent to being an outlaw. You can be harmed and mistreated, overlooked for promotion, bullied and left out of things and if you complain the response will be something like what can you expect, because you are trash. Those photos are taken as permission by every man you've ever spurned who resented it to harrass you, by that creepy guy you wouldn't let kiss you at the office party to send "jokey" sexual harrassment which HR will never address because "your naked photo is on the internet for all to see". I've seen what this kind of thing, even on a small scale, has done to the lives of women I know. They watched their agressor continue to thrive while they were punished over and over in their victimhood. It's a death of a thousand cuts.
 

riath

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Haven't seen much about it, a few posts on my twitter from people i don't follow. I feel so far removed from the generation that shares nude photographs and im 38.

Most of the women I know that are worried about this are late 20s- late 30s.
This is from a person trying to help identify the woman:

“Hey guys, ok so at the moment we can't touch those files as the gardai have told us to stay away from them as there are images of a criminal nature in there. So there's not a lot we can do. There's a lot of us worried, thousands, so we're all in it together. Personally I'm taking the route of, I'm not in there until I know I am. Otherwise I'd drive myself mad. If you need help and support its available from 1800778888 for the DRCC or Women's aid is 1800 341900 or text 50808. ”
 

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