My child is doing my fucking head in (1 Viewer)

Anthony

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My eldest has taken to walking around reciting NWA raps (swear words skillfully replaced). That sounds cool, but he isn't the most socially skilled and will be doing it at the table while people are chatting.

My main gripe, they seem to do everything in slow motion but can be online with headphones on within 1 second on entering the house.
 

egg_

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Slow motion! Ex-fucking-actly! My 12 year old takes 15-20 minutes to put on her school uniform and brush her hair

(it's the 9 year old's tantrum-y contrariness that really gets to me though)
 

billygannon

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Slow motion! Ex-fucking-actly! My 12 year old takes 15-20 minutes to put on her school uniform and brush her hair

(it's the 9 year old's tantrum-y contrariness that really gets to me though)
15-20 minutes??

Luxury...
 

pete

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Our eldest wakes up between 5 & 6am, is banned from leaving her room before 6:30am, and still can’t get out the door to school before 8:30am.
 

billygannon

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God yeah. My one and her mates were in the back of the car last week and that song came on a Now That's What I Call Music CD (yes, they still exist) and they starting going on about how much they loved it.

Taylor Swift I can handle. Katy Perry too. I quite like Dua Lipa. But Liam Gallagher? No!!!!!!
She saw him first at that Ariana Grande Manchester concert. She's only recently found out who Oasis are - and she's not that interested in them.

She has "Beatrix" by the Cocteau Twins on her little playlist - and she really likes that... so maybe it'll all work out in the end.
 

Lili Marlene

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God yeah. My one and her mates were in the back of the car last week and that song came on a Now That's What I Call Music CD (yes, they still exist) and they starting going on about how much they loved it.

Taylor Swift I can handle. Katy Perry too. I quite like Dua Lipa. But Liam Gallagher? No!!!!!!
Boring fact but that song was co-written with professional songwriters who work with the likes of Lorde and Kelly Clarkson so maybe there's some secret ingredient old people like us can't hear.

It's still hilarious though, maybe this is like 12 year olds getting into Phil Collins in 1982? Phil Collins was a full decade younger than Liam at the time but still seems older.
 

egg_

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Ordered another copy of 'How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk' cos I lent the last one out to someone, and need help. FWIW I highly recommend that book
 

nooleen

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Ordered another copy of 'How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk' cos I lent the last one out to someone, and need help. FWIW I highly recommend that book
you need something to read while the kids are rabbiting on at you i'd say
 

billygannon

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Me: "Yes, of course I'll play with my child. Can he just watch another five pro
BLARING The Script downstairs with his friend, I'm sitting up in my room with the dog.
Oh sweet Jesus

The Script...

I... I... am.... so... so... sorry
 

hugh

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There is some hope. She came down last night at midnight complaining about not being able to sleep and watched 10 minutes of the Bowie Five Years doc. Then asked me to record it so she could watch it herself. I announced earlier I was putting on some music and was told the only things that would be acceptable were Bowie or Solange. Now watching Gilmore Girls and Yo La Yengo, Sparks and Sonic Youth turned up doing cameos. Not particularly impressed that these are " Dad's music".

By the way, @egg_ I must congratulate you on the greatest thread title ever.
 

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