Dating Apps OR Just signed up for Bumble. And Hinge. (1 Viewer)

ernesto

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OK. Hadn't deleted/suspended the app as it was still early days, but I wasn't active on it. She didn't like one of my pics (said I was better looking than it implied) so I changed it. She saw it had been changed, accused my of looking around for something better (I wasn't, I was more than happy with how we were getting on and told her as much), called me a cunt and bade me good luck. A little bruised, if wiser.
Be grateful.
Experience has Taught me that you dodged a bullet
 

ann post

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Bumble only shows potential matches in the preview based of your selected age range. Probably in the manual but I just figured it out...
 

jonah

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Wow, people have to think of an anthem on Tinder? I don't even know what I would choose as my anthem...
 

Jill Hives

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As someone who has been single more or less since 2007, I can say most dating apps are awful. Absolutely awful. I could write a book on all the awful dates I've been on over the years. That said, he's my take on how I manage it.

My Photos: To give a fair idea; I choose one where I think I look good, one where I think I look terrible but a friend thinks I look good, one with make-up, one without, and one full body shot with no one else in the photo. Frankly, I think putting your friends, family members or KIDS (ffs) in your dating profile photos is just strange.

Their Photos: If I am slightly attracted to at least one of a dude's photos, I go with it. Mostly because men are horrible at presenting themselves and probably look better in person. If it's just no shirt & muscle images, tigers and/or just shots of motorcycles, I'm on to the next person.

Their Profile: Must contain one full sentence without emojis. Also mentions of music (always helpful), travel and/or at least something that makes me smile or laugh.

Messaging: Within the first five interactions make a quick judgement call. Continue the conversation or end it. Gut instinct. Many people fail this part with dick pics and or sexual inappropriateness right out of the gate.

Meeting: Meet or arrange to meet with in the first week of contact. Try not to text too much during the week or find out more information on the person. Reason being, the person will seem too be good to be true and you will be disappointed when you meet or they will say something little like, "The Rot Hot Chilli Peppers are my favourite band" and it will turn you off and you'll never get out of the house.

When you meet, get there early so you already have a drink. That way, you can offer to get them one when they arrive. After that first drink, you are free and clear to leave since you bought the first found. If you make it through the first drink, and it's going well allow them you buy you one in return. Before a third drink is mentioned, make up in your mind if you even want it. If it's going really well, stay. If it's okay, decline the third drink and make another date to meet so you can gauge it over the next few days. Sometimes people are slow burners or make bad first impressions. If horrible, run and/or laugh. You now have another story to tell.

I decided a while back that I have every right to be choosy who I spend my free time with (perhaps because I rarely have any the last few years) but it's also no good to stay in all the time. Even if out meeting someone you're not sure about, as harsh as it sounds, you might bump into someone else more interesting. It's good to keep getting out of the house and interacting with people.

I'd agree with Scutter (reversed) & Unicron, be decent and you'll easily rise above the utter bullshit on there. Find your own screening process and use it, it saves time. The only good thing about dating at 45 is knowing what you want and what you don't want and being comfortable to say it. I found my boyfriend using Bumble. Out of all of them, I found this one to be the best because men couldn't write me unless I wrote them. Not only does that make it manageable (on my end) but it cut out so much bullshit and unneeded nonsense. Granted, I was in Dublin for a gig and my 40km location changed, so that worked in my favour. I wouldn't have looked in Dublin otherwise. I have Owen Ashworth to thank because nearly a year later we (the BF not Owen) are still together and maybe I'll no longer be a "Roberta C." ;)
 

rettucs

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As someone who has been single more or less since 2007, I can say most dating apps are awful. Absolutely awful. I could write a book on all the awful dates I've been on over the years. That said, he's my take on how I manage it.

My Photos: To give a fair idea; I choose one where I think I look good, one where I think I look terrible but a friend thinks I look good, one with make-up, one without, and one full body shot with no one else in the photo. Frankly, I think putting your friends, family members or KIDS (ffs) in your dating profile photos is just strange.

Their Photos: If I am slightly attracted to at least one of a dude's photos, I go with it. Mostly because men are horrible at presenting themselves and probably look better in person. If it's just no shirt & muscle images, tigers and/or just shots of motorcycles, I'm on to the next person.

Their Profile: Must contain one full sentence without emojis. Also mentions of music (always helpful), travel and/or at least something that makes me smile or laugh.

Messaging: Within the first five interactions make a quick judgement call. Continue the conversation or end it. Gut instinct. Many people fail this part with dick pics and or sexual inappropriateness right out of the gate.

Meeting: Meet or arrange to meet with in the first week of contact. Try not to text too much during the week or find out more information on the person. Reason being, the person will seem too be good to be true and you will be disappointed when you meet or they will say something little like, "The Rot Hot Chilli Peppers are my favourite band" and it will turn you off and you'll never get out of the house.

When you meet, get there early so you already have a drink. That way, you can offer to get them one when they arrive. After that first drink, you are free and clear to leave since you bought the first found. If you make it through the first drink, and it's going well allow them you buy you one in return. Before a third drink is mentioned, make up in your mind if you even want it. If it's going really well, stay. If it's okay, decline the third drink and make another date to meet so you can gauge it over the next few days. Sometimes people are slow burners or make bad first impressions. If horrible, run and/or laugh. You now have another story to tell.

I decided a while back that I have every right to be choosy who I spend my free time with (perhaps because I rarely have any the last few years) but it's also no good to stay in all the time. Even if out meeting someone you're not sure about, as harsh as it sounds, you might bump into someone else more interesting. It's good to keep getting out of the house and interacting with people.

I'd agree with Scutter (reversed) & Unicron, be decent and you'll easily rise above the utter bullshit on there. Find your own screening process and use it, it saves time. The only good thing about dating at 45 is knowing what you want and what you don't want and being comfortable to say it. I found my boyfriend using Bumble. Out of all of them, I found this one to be the best because men couldn't write me unless I wrote them. Not only does that make it manageable (on my end) but it cut out so much bullshit and unneeded nonsense. Granted, I was in Dublin for a gig and my 40km location changed, so that worked in my favour. I wouldn't have looked in Dublin otherwise. I have Owen Ashworth to thank because nearly a year later we (the BF not Owen) are still together and maybe I'll no longer be a "Roberta C." ;)
Still raging I missed that Casiotone gig. Though if I'd have gone maybe I'd have been cramping your style and things wouldn't have worked out as they did :giggle:
 

Jill Hives

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Still raging I missed that Casiotone gig. Though if I'd have gone maybe I'd have been cramping your style and things wouldn't have worked out as they did :giggle:
I didn’t meet him there. It was cold where I was staying that night and I couldn’t sleep so I decided to have a look on bumble. 😂 It was a good gig though, you should have gone.
 

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