Search results for query: *

"You are not cute!". "James is cute" (Nicolas Ralph as James Herriot), "Link is cute too" (Link Neal of Rhett and Link/Good Mythical Morning) "That's it!" "Nobody else is cute". She's 4. I can't even really argue with her.

In a similar vein my 3 year old has a potty mouth. "You're an asshole!" to her big brother yesterday "I need the fucking bathroom" earlier today Luckily the grandparents are pretty deaf

"I like that Lasagne guy" - the three year old. Thanks again @Burgerbarbaby

I noticed a it of a gap between the boys front teeth so I asked him if his tooth was loose. (Pushing his tongue against it) Oh, yeah, it is wobbly, that's a relief, I thought I'd broken it a few days ago. You thought you'd broken your tooth and you didn't say anything. I didn't want to have to...

Three and a half year old (remembering something from before he was 2): "Remember that time when we were on an airplane and you gave me some Ems to eat? I like Ems" Himself "What are Ems? What are you talking about?" Me "You mean the crunchy M&Ms when we were flying to London?" "Yes, but...

At the sight of another small child in a Christmassy hat (in between hysterical laughter) "He's pretending to be Farmer Christmas" "That tree with lights in it looks like it's pretending to be a Christmas tree" Watching that Christmas themed Cornflakes ad "That man is pretending to be Farmer...

"Oh Noooo!" (with his head in his hands) "I'm having a horrible day!" (through fingers) "That's the worst thing that has ever happened to me" (threatening to cry) because I told him he would have to have his teeth brushed before bed - he'd spent the whole day playing with us and his granparents...

We finally resolved the "check" mystery after weeks of trying to figure out where he learned it - the robotic sock monkey in Julius Jnr. This morning he was trying Jedi Mind tricks on me. "Where are you going Mommy?" "I'm going to work" Very calmly and slowly "No, you are not going to work...

Playing a hidden object game with little monkey, nearly 3. I was calling out the objects he had to find while he was using the mouse. Me: "cat" him: "Check, cat!" and then when he found it "Cat! Check!" and so on for every item... he takes it very seriously!

Toddler: "When I was a mountain, YOU were STUCK!" Me: "What did you say?" Toddler "When I was a mountain, you were STUCK... on ME" The mind boggles

Darn back is acting up again, sitting awkwardly on the sofa trying to get food into the mouth of a bouncy 2 and a half year old who refused to eat at dinner time but announces he's starving 30 minutes after it's time for bed. "Please sit still, I don't want to put food in your eye" "You ok...

This morning "Get that the fuck out!". We decided not to do timeouts but seriously tempted to introduce them for the "supposed" grown up boy (his Dad). Grrrr. There may be blood spilled in Kilmainham tonight.

After listening patiently (for the first and so far only time) to his Dad and me filling each other in on how our day went - as soon as we'd both stopped talking "Annnd that's the story in Balamory" before he nearly fell off the sofa laughing at his joke. Signsyourtoddlerwatchestoomuchtelevision

We read it as part of his bedtime wind down. Non picture books work better for that because he's happy just to look at the cover for a few a little while and then close his eyes and listen until he falls asleep.

I haven't seen one, but haven't looked either. I just read him the original story, think he's similar age to your toddler and he seemed to like it.

This morning, first thing "Mommy, hit Daddy". I have no idea why he wanted me to hit his Dad and he wouldn't explain.

Sick Daddy for the last week has meant lots of listening to nursery rhymes on youtube for the 2 and a half year old while I'm at work with hilarious and genius results. Aside from the brand new, but pretty tuneful despite the 11 volume setting, renditions of all the old classics with his own...

This morning: Don't go to work Mommy. I have to go to work. I'm taking your shoes!

Me "Would you like me to read you a story?" Him "Read the book about rocks, and trees, and mountains... emmmm... and baggies!" Can you guess the book...

Phrase of the weekend "Mommy did it" (by which he means he wants Mommy to do it). Poor daddy was persona non-grata. Offers to make "hungy" boy food - "Mommy did it?" Offers to play cars - "Mommy did it?" Movie - "Mommy did it?" And then there was last night's melt down which eventually turned...