Loneliness (1 Viewer)

[GARYXKNIFEDX]

I wonder would this thread have happened had covid not lasted so long

 

[rettucs]

Basically the opposite.

Being with people tires me out, being alone is recovery and feels like a relief.

I'm surprised to see this many people here that also don't seem to get very lonely. I suspect that this isn't a representational sample, most people get lonely from what I've seen.

Where I live now is highly social and the village kind of knows me because I'm still a novelty. It's almost reminiscent of Coronation Street in the sense there's this highly improbable pub that more or less everyone turns up and discusses things. If they don't turn up at the pub they'll end up in the front garden here, so I see everyone. This is luring me back out into being more social and less consciously isolating. I feel more control, I can just leave and walk to a guaranteed safe home if I like.

I don't think people would criticize you feeling needy, or even define it as needy at all. I'd always thought wanting company is the normal human condition. Virtually everyone I meet up with would align with that kind of thinking.

that sounds lovely. I take it you have zero regrets about moving back then?

 

[rettucs]

I wonder would this thread have happened had covid not lasted so long

I've been to 2 funerals this year for parents of friends who basically just gave up because of covid and all the lockdowns. They got into a rut and just couldn't get back out of it. Once they gave up, their health declined and there was no going back. Very sad.

 

[sleepy]

Do you get lonely much? I used to feel wild lonely as a kid and early adult. Lately, I've started feeling lonelier than ever. It feels more profound because it's so mundane, if that makes a whit of sense. I hate feeling so needy.

We’ve just been through 2 years of a pandemic where we’ve had to pretty much avoid everyone. I think what you’re feeling is completely natural. Also, I wouldn’t be too down on myself for needing people. I don’t think it’s a bad thing at all. The fact that you’re looking human interaction is a healthy thing in my completely untrained opinion. A lot of people have become more insular and anxious over the last 2 years, so I kind of think it’s a good thing that you’re actually wanting to get out and meet people.

 

[JohnnyRaz]

is this whole thread a cry for a thumped meet up?

 

[pete]

No.

 

[flashback]

that sounds lovely. I take it you have zero regrets about moving back then?

Yeah, no regrets.

Ireland is still a pain in the hole, I'd forgotten how slow and awkward stuff can be here. But no, no regrets at all. In fairness on my first day in NYC, sitting in the subway station getting the train to work I suspected I'd made a huge mistake. I thought I'd give it a year or so to check, and ended up giving it 20 something years. I was fairly sure about the decision having had that much time to think it over.

 

[snakybus]

It's lonely at the top, lads.

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[egg_]

I'd forgotten how slow and awkward stuff can be here

Aren't you living in rural West Cork? And were in DC before? I dunno if you're comparing like with like here

 

[ernesto]

Aren't you living in rural West Cork? And were in DC before? I dunno if you're comparing like with like here

Is that not the point of the comparison though?
They are so Unalike

 

[Cormcolash]

Perhaps we could build a subway system in rural West Cork?

 

[egg_]

Is that not the point of the comparison though?
They are so Unalike

Ah yeah, I was just trying to say the slowness and awkwardness @flashback is experiencing is probably just as much to do with country versus city as with Ireland versus US

 

[Cormcolash]

Bog versus normal

 

[David Kronenbourg]

I lived alone for 3 years. Best 3 years of my life

 

[seanc]

I am happier in my own company most of the time, but sometimes I get lonely. Sometimes I get lonely a lot. I think it was during lockdown that I started lurking back around these pages. And to be honest. it helped and helps a lot to chat to you lot. You're at a remove and talking about stuff that I don't normally get to talk about with people here. I would like to give pete a big thank you.

Also, the local pub I've found to be great for the loneliness. Everyone there has there own things going on, but if I want to go and be around people I can go there. I can help them, they can help me. If I don't want to talk to anyone, I'll just stay at home. But we're all lonely.

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I do realise that I'm promoting alcohol use and internet trolling as treatments to loneliness.

 

[nuke terrorist]

when I hear the word 'loneliness' this is the first thing I think of -

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[pete]

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[flashback]

Aren't you living in rural West Cork? And were in DC before? I dunno if you're comparing like with like here

No way! West Cork was way too highfalutin and flashy for me.

I'm in East Cork. Chalk and cheese.

 

[flashback]

Ah yeah, I was just trying to say the slowness and awkwardness @flashback is experiencing is probably just as much to do with country versus city as with Ireland versus US

Some of it is rural, but things in Ireland are slow in general. The banking industry here is mental for example. Basic stuff like getting driving license stuff together... I dunno, national stuff is slow and clunky, as well as local stuff.
A lot of it is out of ignorance though. I've spent the vast majority of my adult life in the US, but I forgot about that. I know the American way of doing adult stuff and it's different here, meaning I have to learn about how things work here before I can even kick anything off.

 

[magicbastarder]

there's that maxim; that galway is where hippies who haven't made any money live, and that west cork is where the ones who *have* made money live.